When A Jerk Guy Met With A Silly Lady
by omuraisu3883
Summary: For him he was nothing but a responsibility but for her he is the bliss from God. Together they tried to sail the ship; they met with heavy storms and a series of rogue waves that almost wrecked their ship but miraculously the ship was strong enough to keep sailing. Together they realised that the sun shining more brightly after the storm.
1. Prologue

**Author's Note: **This story is originally posted on LU years ago and I don't have a chance to finish it. I'm currently trying my best to continue writing this story until the final chapter. I'm the type of author who wrote short stories (lest than 10 chapters), that's why I'm struggling to finish this story. So, wish me luck!

The stories will be base on 3 person's POV. The first one will be in Yi Jeong's POV. Reviews are highly encourage because as an author, your review are the strength for me to keep on writing.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Boy Before Flowers and its characters. However, this fanfic and the story line is mine. Please do not re-upload or re-translated without my approval and the most important thing, don't ever plagiarising my story because it will make you a bad person and not cool.

* * *

**Prologue**

_Yi Jeong's POV_

I've reached the F4 lounge a little early today. Guess I'm too excited and can't wait to tell my friends about the good news. I looked down at my arms, my two-year-old son Yul Jin was sleeping soundly in my embraced, with his head rested on my shoulder. Maybe he just too tired after spending the whole day on the guys-bonding time with me. I chuckled a little, how could I be so horrible before, to think that this adorable little guy in my arms was just a result to my stupid action.

I still remember the day I landed in Korea after spending four torturing years in Sweden. I immediately went to meet 'his mother' but just a short while because Jun Pyo forced me to accompany him to propose to Jan Di. We celebrated that night at the hotel near the shore where the proposal took placed. I don't realise when did Ga Eul arrived there but we drank a lot at that time.

I offered to usher Ga Eul to her suite because I was more sober than her. Little that I knew that that was the biggest stupid decision I ever had. The next morning, I woke up with her in my arms, without any threads covering our bodies and a little blood spot on the white bed sheet. We agreed to keep it secret from our friends and blamed it solely on the liquid called 'alcohol'. I, the master of disguise managed to act like it never happen and continued to see her regularly.

Again I chuckled when the scene replaying on my mind. NO, alcohol was innocent because I'm completely sober that night. Well I did drink some wine and maybe that was the reason why I didn't put any protection that night, _was it?_ But I'm very sure how I missed her so much, I remember how it felt when I'm kissing all parts of her body, I remember the way our skin friction with each other and that night I have the best sleep I ever got, with her in my arms.

Five weeks later, on our routine 'outing' (not dating), she told me the consequence of that one night. I was shocked, too shocked to utter a single word. Damn, what have I done? I did have different feelings for her but I'm not sure yet what it was. I'm not a man that capable to take care of anyone even of myself, how the hell that I can provide comfort and smooth life to this little 'thing' inside her womb?

.

.

The lounge's door was opened and Song Woo Bin emerged from it and waved at me;

"Yo Bro!"

He walked closer to my seat and planted a kiss on Yul Jin's forehead. He then proceeded to the small bar to take a glass of water. A few minutes later J and J couple and also Ji Hoo arrived. They also eagerly wanted to kiss the sleeping Yul Jin and the commotion especially from Jun Pyo made him stirred a little. Jan Di smacked his head and signalling him to lower down his voice.

"So we all are here, what do you want to tell us." Woo Bin impatiently asking me since I seldom called for special meeting like this.

I took a deep breath and tried to relax myself;

"Ga Eul is pregnant again." I said with a big smile plastered on my face and unconsciously tighten my embraced on Yul Jin.

"WHAT!" all of them scream at me except for Ji Hoo who just rolled his eyes as big as he can. Jan Di stood up abruptly while screaming at me and her voice was the highest pitch ever and it even woken up the sleeping Yul Jin.

Yul Jin startled and began to whining a little protest because the voices interrupted his sleep. I patted and caress his back while whispering to his ears;

"Hush, hush Yul Jin-ah, go back to sleep. Appa's here."

I rocked my body a little and planted butterfly kisses on his head. He soon calmed down and continued to sleep. All eyes focus on me, some still angry with me and some were amused on the ex-Casanova's fatherly action.

"Bro, I still can't believe that you can be so caring although I've seen it so many times already. Are you the same guy that hunting girls with me before?"

Good, thank you Woo Bin for jumping into different subject. I wanted to answer to Woo Bin but Jan Di cut me off.

"Yi Jeong-sunbae, do you realise that I'm suppressing my jumping reverse side kick right now for the sake of Yul Jin. I hope you still remember receiving my kick twice last time here in this same spot." I can feel the anger in her voice because she gritted her teeth while speaking to me."How could you do that to her? What is your excuse this time? You got drunk again? I knew it, I knew I shouldn't let you live with her."


	2. A Jerk Guy Named So Yi Jeong

**Chapter 1: A Jerk Guy Named So Yi Jeong**

**.**

Confused? I know some of you were confused by Jan Di's resentment at me. Why would she be mad like that, well why wouldn't she? To understand more, why don't we went back to the moment after the first time Ga Eul told me that I made her pregnant.

That shocking news left me confused of everything. What exactly do I feel? What am I going to do about it? How will this 'thing' change my life? Why was it happen to me? And the funniest thing was all these confusions only led me to one answer; 'I DON'T KNOW'.

So after taking considerate amount of times, I finally made a decision. A decision that I knew would left many hearts broken especially the one who carried 'it'. Commitment never been written in my dictionary. I can force myself to marry her but I'm more afraid to think what lies in the future if we got married. I may or may not be a good husband, I may or may not hurt her more and the worst and the most fearful thing that crossed my mind; she may or may not become like my mother.

I admitted that I did consider to 'destroying' the only evidence that led me to this trouble. If 'it' gone than my problems also gone just like that. But every time I tried to voice out my awful suggestion to her, my voice would stuck on my throat and suddenly I became mute. So I told her what can I offer to her and I'm not surprised when she accepted my decision open heartedly without any protest or what so ever.

I gathered all my courage to break the news to our friends, readied myself to be a punching bag that will be a generous receiver. All of them stared impatiently at me, waited for my voice to come out again after seventeen minutes I said; "I have something very important to tell you guys."

I took a deep breath and tried to relax myself;

"Ga Eul is pregnant." I said with an awkward smile plastered on my face and unconsciously tighten my hold on Ga Eul's hand _(can you notice the similarity?)._

"WHAT!" all of them scream at me except for Ji Hoo who just rolled his eyes as big as he can. Jan Di stood up abruptly while screaming at me and her voice was the highest pitch ever.

"Ga Eul-ah, can you move aside please." Jan Di's voice suddenly changed into the sweetest tone ever that made me and Ga Eul shivered. Ga Eul quickly nodded and gave a sympathy look at me before moved to sit beside Woo Bin.

"Yi Jeong-sunbae can you stand up please." Oh my, that voice really drained my blood away. Was she a witch, because I felt like being casted right now. I can't think of anything and just followed her order.

Suddenly I felt something slammed on my cheek and that impact caused me to fly into the floor. I rubbed my cheek in attempts to ease the pain and trying to adjust my sit on the floor. All people who sitting on the chair look at me in you-deserved-it expression except for the lovely girl beside Woo Bin who look so worried at me. I returned her a smile, signalling her that I'm alright.

"So bro, when we will hear the wedding bells ringing?"

I look at Woo Bin, contemplated to answer his question. Slowly I rose up myself and adjust my standing.

"There will be no wedding."

"What do you mean by that?" There was a sensed of anger in Woo Bin's voice.

"I'm not going to marry Ga Eul but I…"

I can't finish my words because I was sent back flying to the floor again by Jan Di's kick but the worst part was not from the kick, but from the mafia king who started to beat me continuously. I've readied myself for Jan Di but not from a man that can handle ten men in a single blow. Luckily Ji Hoo stepped in and grabbed Woo Bin to calm him down.

What's wrong with him? I knew that he was close to Ga Eul while I'm gone but I'm still his best buddy. Suddenly I felt mad when I thought about the possibilities that might happen while I'm gone but I decided not to think too much because I don't want to know.

"Bastard! I thought you've change after coming back from Sweden, but you become worse than before. A real gentleman should take responsible of all his action." Woo Bin screaming at me and tried to release himself from Ji Hoo.

"That's right, Jeong-ah. We should be responsible from the beginning till the end." Jun Pyo also scolded me while trying to calm Jan Di.

Ga Eul went to my side and wiped the blood from my lips. I could see that she was trying to hold her tears.

"It's alright Jan Di-ah, Woo Bin-sunbae, Jun Pyo-sunbae, Ji Hoo-sunbae. It was a mistake from the beginning. We were both drunk and ... and it happen. Please don't blame Yi Jeong-sunbae alone because it was my fault too."

"Ga Eul-ah, what about you? How can you raise your child alone?"

"Who said I would leave Ga Eul alone. I will take full responsible of my action. I still can take care of them without married to Ga Eul."

"Does that mean you will only be responsible financially?"

"No, I will stay by her side and take care of her during her pregnancy period."

"I thought only Jun Pyo got the disease, I never notice that you are more stupid than him." Jan Di glared at me.

"Hey." Jun Pyo tried to argued

"Shut up Jun Pyo, or I'll give you the same kick I gave to your friend just now. So Yi Jeong-sunbae, from what you told us, don't you think that it's sound like a married couple already. A husband who want to take care of his pregnant wife?"

"Err sort of but in my case I don't want to be attached officially to anyone. It's better this way than be marry without love." I don't know why I cringed after I said it.

"And you agreed to this scheme Ga Eul?"

"Yes."

After more persuasion from Ga Eul, they finally accepted my decisions. Our next destination was Ga Eul's hometown. Her parents had move to her father's birth place in Busan.

To tell the truth, I'm terrified to meet her parents. What I had done to their precious daughter and what will I do to her would be enough motivation for them to send me to hell and yes it almost did. I was beaten by her father with a broom and needed to be sent to the hospital for further check-up. I could see the pain in her parent's eyes when they listen to Ga Eul's explanation. I knew they disagree with her decision and persuaded her to come and live with them.

They said they will accept Ga Eul and her child and will love them wholeheartedly. I stared at Ga Eul to read her reaction. Her parents offer seems more attractive than mine because I can only offer her protection and money but not love. I knew I should be happy if she accepted their offer because it will end all my misery but some reason, I don't want her away from me. I want her near me, always.

I released the breath that I hold when I heard that Ga Eul want to stick with our plan to live together. I'm confused, why I'm so afraid that Ga Eul would agree with her parent's suggestion and left me alone? Why? Again I don't know and I'm afraid to search for the real answer.


	3. A House Called Home

**Chapter 2; A House Called Home**

**.**

So we went back to Seoul and I told her that we need a new house for us to live. Her apartment was too small and my house (mansion) was too big for her taste. Oh I forgot to tell that my parents didn't care at all about my wellbeing and in times like this I'm glad that they didn't interfere with my life. I can do whatever I want.

And the search for a house began. I admitted it was fun to find a house with Ga Eul. Although we had a few (many actually) arguments regarding the house we chose, it would always brought smile to my face when I saw her strongly pointed out her reason. In the end none of us agreed with each other selection.

I almost give up, at first I thought that she would agree on my selection but it turned out that she was also hard to please and very selective. What's wrong with a penthouse that had five bedrooms, or a condo that face the full view of Seoul or a modern look bungalow up on the hill? My patience getting thinner at every hour that passed by. Was she intent to delay the time to move in with me? And why I'm so pissed off every time I thought about it?

One week later, on our way home after another failure to pick a house, we passed by a small (for me) single storey bungalow that had a beautiful garden surrounding the house. It was located on a leafy well established street in suburb area of Seoul. The bungalow was a mixture of traditional Korean architecture especially the roof and modern contemporary style for the building.

I realised that there was a sparkle in Ga Eul's eyes when she saw the house and I like it too so I stop the car in front of the gate.

"Yah! What are you doing." I ignored her and just got out from the car. She followed me closer.

"Well Ga Eul, do you like this house?" I asked her.

"Yes, of course. But this house is not for sell."

"Says who?" I just smirked at her and rang the bell. A few second later an old man opened the gate.

"Can I help you?" He asked while smiling at us.

"Haraboji, are you the owner of the house."

"Yes I am the owner."

"Then sell the house to me. Just name the price and I'll pay you on the spot."

His face slowly changed from a friendlier smile to a furious face. He was angry.

"Oi young man, did you see any sign that told you that my house is for sell? Why are you so rude barging to my house like this, are you crazy?" And he slammed his gate in front of my face. I want to ring the bell again but Ga Eul immediately pulled me back to my car.

"Enough sunbae, this house was not for sell and he's right. You're so rude!" I chose not to argue with her because she was angry. Angry pregnant woman was so dangerous and it was better to just listen to them. Well old man, I'm not done yet. Nobody can mess up with So Yi Jeong.

But he did mess up with me. That old man was very stubborn. I sent my secretary to negotiate with him and my secretary even offered him ten times higher than the house actual price but he still didn't want to sell his house. I can't wait any longer, I must have it so that Ga Eul and I can live together. I have no choice than to meet with him again by myself.

He dared to shoo me away a few times until I ended up begging him to let me see him. After a few more persuasion and determination, he finally let me in to the house. The interior of the house showed the love in his family. Their picture frames with happy faces hanging at every corner of the house that makes me felt slightly jealous and my heart hurt. I wish it was me in the picture frame, smiling and laughing heartily with my parents but it was too good to be true for the So.

I looked around the house and realised that the old man live alone.

"Haraboji, I'm very sorry for my rude behaviour earlier but if you don't mind I'm asking, why don't you want to sell this house. I think the price I offered you was more than enough for you to buy a new house and enjoyed your life forever. Beside, don't you feel lonely here?"

"Mr So, I also wonder why do you want my house so badly when you can buy a new house that bigger and prettier than this house."

"Because I like the house and ... my girlfriend also like it."

"So you go this far only for a lady?"

I just kept silent and shyly look at anything except for his face. I don't want to deny it because he was right. He continued to speak to me.

"When the first time I build this house, I was just married to the love of my life. It started with only two bedrooms but it gradually grew as my family also grew bigger. I spent half of my life here, this house is my home where I always can come back no matter how far I go, this house gave me warmth during the freezing season, this house witness the first laughter from my eldest child and this house also hold a memory of my late wife until her final breath. If you asked me why I don't want to sell it then I can give to you even a hundred reasons."

I listen intently every word he said. I can't help to want his house even more. I pictured myself in his shoes and imagined myself to be the main actor and Ga Eul to be the main actress, we could be happy here. How pathetic, just the thought of it made me smiled like a mad man.

"I hurt her from the very first time we met. I continually hurt her even though I know by hurting her I actually slash my own heart. You know me right? Everyone in Korea knows who I am. I'm not a good man and nothing can change that. So I swear to myself to do anything that can make her happy. I'm willing to do anything you ask and I know I'm being selfish to ask you to give up your heaven but please, please sell this house to me."

"You are very stubborn Mr So, just like me." I heard him chuckled leisurely. "My son did ask me to live with him but that time I have no reason to leave." He then took a deep breath and scanning his house and said; "This house is not happy anymore, I can feel it. Maybe it hates the silence surrounding it. I'm not sure what's your plan with your girlfriend in the future but I believe that you two can make this house livelier and happy again. It's an old house but I can assure you that it is tougher than it looks because it has a strong foundation. I personally build it with my hand."

With those words, the old man finally agreed to sell his house to me with the last price that I had offered before. 10 times higher than the original price, slightly higher price than a penthouse that had five bedrooms, or a condo that face the full view of Seoul or a modern look bungalow up on the hill which I intended to keep it secret from the stingy Ga Eul and I'll bring the secret with me to my grave. If she knew the real price, I'll bet with my life that she won't move in with me forever.

Finally the day that I've been waiting for arrived and she was amazed and amused when she saw the house after I loosen my handkerchief that covered her eyes. She immediately roamed around the house, checking all the four bedrooms and the three bathrooms, walking barefooted at the beautiful garden that been well maintained by the previous owner and she also surveyed the small workshop adjacent to the kitchen.

"That old man was a carpenter and he builds his stuffs here. I think I can do my pottery here too." I said to her as she looks inside the workshop.

"That's great sunbae, the workshop is just opposite to the kitchen, so I can just yell out your name from the kitchen when the food is ready." She beamingly clapped her hand with a big smile on her face as she imagining our life in the future.

I can't help myself to smile widely with her and feels contented just at the thought of spending my life with her. For the first time in my life, I finally found a house that I can call home.

"I'm home."


	4. Living Arrangement

**Chapter 3; Living Arrangement**

**.**

"It's a nice house but I'm surprised that Yi Jeong-sunbae only bought you this kind of house. I mean, I thought he will buy you a mansion consider that you actually bearing HIS child." I could feel that my ears flaring with flame when I heard Jan Di's sarcastic comment.

It was not the first time that she intentionally burned my ears, stabbed my heart with a sharp dagger, and whacked my brain with a baseball bat. She was the master of torturing, physically and psychologically and I pitied my best friend Gu Jun Pyo for had to live with her until his last breath. I had to lock my mouth and tried very hard not to answer all her nasty comments because it was really my fault to begin with.

"Jan Di-ah, I'm the one who doesn't want a big house. There's no need because it is only me and Yi Jeong-sunbae." Ga Eul tried to explain the real reason.

"So you two will start to live together today right?" Jan Di just ignoring the previous answer and started to question further.

Ga Eul just nodded her head.

"I believe that you two will sleep in separate rooms, right sunbae?"

I was shocked at that sudden question being pointed to me but I nodded energetically and said; "This house has four bedrooms and we already arranged two bedrooms to be our room."

"I know because I already inspected the entire house and surprisingly I found that each room has a king size bed. Is there a need sunbae?" I'm confused, why she asked a weird question?

"Yah, Geum Jan Di, why are you asking this stupid question? What's wrong with the king size bed? All our beds are king size bed." At least Jun Pyo also as confused as me. But I realised that Ga Eul's face started to blush and Ji Hoo and Woo Bin also showed a knowing smile.

"Arghh, just forget it, just forget that I ever ask that question. I think to be safe, let me occupy the third bedroom or I can just sleep with Ga Eul, the king size bed is HUGE ENOUGH for TWO persons to sleep."

"NO!" Jun Pyo and I simultaneously rejected that stupid idea. Everybody was looking at us as to ask further explanation. I immediately look at Jun Pyo with pleading eyes, hoping that he can come out with a reasonable explanation because I have none. Understanding my desperate need, he said;

"Jan Di-ah, you don't have time to take care of your own self, how come you want to take care of Ga Eul. You will start your internship this year, you will work 60 hours a week and most of all our wedding is just four months from now and we need to prepare for it."

"Jun Pyo-sunbae is right, Jan Di-ah I know you have a good intention but I can take care of myself, you can trust me."

"Of course I trust you Ga Eul but I don't trust HIM." Jan Di pointed her finger at me and I just feigning innocent.

"Okay I promise I won't hurt her. By the way, let just eat. I specially cooked the foods with Ga Eul for you guys as a celebration for our new house." I immediately changed the subject.

"I'm still not satisfied with all these. Why can't you just marry her? Why can't you commit to her officially when all the things you do now are the same like a married couple do….

"JAN DI-ah! Ga Eul's high voice cut off Jan Di's ranting. Everyone was shocked to see the gentle and soft spoken Ga Eul lost her temper. Jan Di didn't seem to flinch and they started the staring challenged for a moment. Silence surrounding our living room, I could feel the temperature suddenly drop to zero degree and goosebumps all over my body. I doubted that my friends didn't feel the same like me.

In the end the unexpected person surrendered. "Arasso Ga Eul-ah. I should respect your decision. Let's eat, I'm starving already. Ga Eul-ah did you make your famous kimbap?"

"Of course, I know you love kimbap." And just like that they turn back to be BFF (best friend forever) again, giggling with each other and hand in hand walking to the dining table.

That night I couldn't sleep. I tossing and turning around my bed, forcing my eyes to close but still my mind didn't want to rest. Once in a while, I glanced at the left side wall and hoping to get an x-ray vision so that I could see the person behind that wall. At last I gave up to force to sleep and I decided to take a drink at the kitchen.

As I opened my bedroom door, I realised that the light in the kitchen was turn on. I guess I'm not the only one who couldn't sleep that night. I crept to the kitchen slowly and saw her drinking her milk. She immediately noticed my silhouette and smile warmly at me.

"Can't sleep too sunbae?"

"Yeah, maybe I'm not use to the new bed and the new surroundings." I just made that excuse. Since when did I'm not use with the different beds? I remember every hotel room that I went before have different beds and still I can sleep soundly on it.

"Me too sunbae." That I knew was an honest answer.

Then I proceeded to the fridge and took the water bottle. I slowly drank the plain water from the bottle. While gulping the water, my eyes were travelling from her head to her toe. Damn she looks so sexy in her white night gown and I had to increase the speed of gulping the cold water until the bottle was empty. After a few minutes of silence, I braved myself to ask her;

"Ga Eul-yang, can I…sleep with you." Shocked was written all over her face as soon as she heard my words. "I mean it's easier for me to look after you in case you have difficulties at night."

She took quite some times to think and just stared at the glass of milk that almost empty but I waited for her answer patiently. Slowly she rose up her face and staring at me. Her eyes were searching for something. At first I stared back at her but then I remembered that she had a telemetry power that can read my actual mind that connected straight to my heart. It was funny that I myself can't or slowed to read my mind. Maybe the junction of my synapses was too big or blocked that forbid the signal to reach the destination. That was why my mind and heart seems disconnected; remind me to meet with the neurologist later.

To prevent her from sucking all the secret information from my brain any further, I immediately look at anything except her. Then I heard her voice again;

"Okay sunbae."

"REALLY!" Unintentionally I raised my voice along with a big grin on my lips. She just chuckled at my weird (for me) behaviour.

"Yes sunbae, you can sleep with me. Just don't tell Jan Di about it."

"Of course I won't tell her. I still want to live you know." Again she was laughing at my remarked. "Come on let sleep now, although we don't have to work tomorrow, we still have lots to unpack and cleaning to do."

"Let me wash this glass first."

And here I am, still tossing and turning beside her in her bedroom. She was at my side yet I still felt that she was too far, now I started to hate the wideness of this king size bed. I don't know if she already asleep or not because her back was facing me and she was not moving at all ever since she laid on the bed.

"Ga Eul-yang, are you asleep?"

"Not yet sunbae." She still not moving.

"Ga Eul-yang can I …hold you?"

"Yes sunbae." Surprisingly she didn't need time to think and just agreed with my request.

Slowly I moved to her side and placed my arm around her waist and no rejection from her. So I tighten my hold and brought her closer to my body, her back crash with my chest and still no rejection from her. She felt so warm and she smelled good. I nuzzled my nose at her smooth and silky hair and I became greedy, I want more.

"Ga Eul-yang can I …kiss you."

I can feel her body stiffen in my arms, maybe she was surprised at my greedy request. I can't blame her because I'm also surprised with myself, bad bad mouth (I reprimanded myself). Just as I'm about to undo my words, she finally said;

"You can sunbae."

I was shocked at first but immediately replaced by a joyful feeling. The same feeling that I got when I received a toy from my father during my childhood year.

I started to kiss her shoulder, than I rose myself a bit and kiss her cheek and I pulled her shoulder gently to see her face. Maybe my vision already adapt with the darkness of the room because I could see her face clearly. Her beautiful shinning eyes staring lovingly at me and I couldn't help to descending my face to capture her luscious lips. I kissed her lips gently, nibbling at her lower lip and took time to taste her. She shyly returned my kissed and I can tell that she was an amateur kisser.

Suddenly my naughty little light bulb appeared over my head as I recalled the request that I had asked her before. I did asked her permission to kiss her but I never stated specifically where I wanted to kiss her. So if I kissed her in different places, would she stop me? Only one way to know.

My lips moved down to her jaw line and descended further to her neck. I could feel her hands grasped at the back of my head and silently I prayed that she won't push me away and my prayer had been heard. She pulled me closer and soft moans escaped from her throat. Then all the scene that happen eight weeks ago replayed on my mind and I felt the urged to taste it again. I stopped kissing her and stared at her face again. I gulped my dried throat and said;

"Ga Eul-yang, can I … can I…" Damn it was hard to ask.

"Sunbae, you only need to asked permission to get something that was not belong to you." She then took a deep breath. "I'm already yours sunbae, since the past, now and forever." She then cupped my cheeks and gently caresses it. "Saranghae Yi Jeong-sunbae."

"Ga Eul-yang…." I was speechless to hear her sudden confession. She continued to caresses my face and her soft touched made me weak and then I kissed her hungrily. I'm starving for her sweet taste, hungered for her soft touch and keened to find the warmth from her soft skin.

After a few hours, we laid together nakedly at the centre of the bed. She was already asleep on my bare chest and I could hear her soft and calm breathing. I held her closely, not even wanting to let her go.

"What did I do?" I mentally asked myself. "Maybe you actually drinking a soju instead of plain water and maybe she was drinking a rice wine instead of milk." The voice from my left side tried to calm me. "Well that was the stupidest excused I ever heard." That was the voice from my right side.

I closed my eyes and realised that there was only one explanation to all this mess, yes only because of that reason. It was because I'm a certified jerk. A jerk who like to take advantage over a naïve and innocent lady. The first time I took advantage while she was drunk and now I took advantage on her love to me. But the worst thing was why I never regretted it although I knew it was wrong? Why I never learn the lesson and did it again and again and again like a married couple.

Because from the first day we live in this house, I never ever again step in my bedroom at nights. My designated bedroom was left deserted and I only entered that room to change my cloth, or the time when Ga Eul's parent came to visit us or when Ga Eul kicked me out from her room.

At least now I know why Jan Di's hate that king size bed. Ga Eul should listen to her when she said that I can't be trusted. I should listen to Jan Di and just married Ga Eul because she was right from the beginning, we did look like a married couple already.

I admitted that I have this strange feeling towards Ga Eul and its weird because that feeling getting bigger and stronger every day. I hope she can wait until I can define the meaning of that strange feeling because the thought of her leaving me scared me out of my wits.


	5. The Pregnant Lady

**Chapter 4: The Pregnant Lady**

**.**

"Yi Jeong-sunbae, come here I can feel that he's moving." I heard Ga Eul called me from the living room. She was watching the drama while I'm reviewing the work proposal at the study desk. She always like that, every time when she felt him moving inside her she will call me to feel it together and I will automatically stop at anything I'm doing to go to her.

I can feel him kicking while I'm putting my hands on Ga Eul's belly. I thought that she would feel the pain but she was smiling widely every time he kicked. Ga Eul quit her job when she was four month pregnant because she said that she wanted to fully focus on her pregnancy. I didn't mind at all and not ask her too much questions about it because I've already gave her a black Amex card for daily expenses so technically, she didn't need a job at all.

She put her hands on top of my hands and said;

"Yul Goon-ah, omma and appa love you so much. We can't wait to see you soon."

"Yah, you are watching too much drama. I said I don't like that name. I bet you want to name your second son Shin Goon." Ga Eul's obsession over the drama 'Goong' especially towards the two main actors worried me too much. I hope this boy won't look like them because someone said to me that the baby's face will look like the face that the mother saw the most.

"What's wrong with that name, it's a good name you know."

"But I want to call him Tae Jin."

"Why?"

"Because it's a good name too."

How fast time had flied and now she was eight month pregnant. We only knew 'his' gender last month after so much argument. At first we didn't want to know the gender and wanted it to be a surprise but it turned out that the decision make us argued more about the name. That time I have my own choice of name, one for a girl and one for a boy and same with her. With the advised from Dr Yoon Ji Hoo we finally knew the gender and the argument now down to only between two names, not four like before.

I already give in too much to her. How many times that she kicked me out from her room because she said I'm too smelly and she felt disgusted to look at my face. How come I'm smelly when I already took a shower for five times already? How dare she insulted me and said my handsome face that adored by men and women disgusting? I never felt so mad but I never showed it to her and just followed her bizarre behaviour. Like her father had said;

"I hope you can be more patient during her pregnancy period because I'm sure your life will be like hell, trust me because I've been there before. Blamed it on her mother's gene."

Her father, the same man that hit me before, actually looking at me with sympathetic eyes when he gave me that advised and I understood every meaning of his words.

There was a time when she asked me to buy her a beef bulgogi and instructed me to buy it at the exact stall that she mention to me. The problem was that the stall situated outside Seoul, specifically at Incheon and I kind a busy that week to seal a certain deal so I just bought her the bulgogi that sold nearby my office. As soon as she had her first bite, she started to wail like a small kid. Her face was red and smudged with fluids, some coming from her eyes, some coming from her nose and surprisingly some coming from her mouth.

I tried many ways to soothe her and told her that I'm very sorry to deceive her about the bulgogi but she never want to stop wailing. So I have no choice than to drive her to Incheon in the middle of the night and only to find out that the stall was closed because the owner had gone to her hometown in Busan. She looks very disappointed and my heart constricted when I saw her sad face.

So I called my secretary and asked him to prepare my helicopter at Incheon airport and at the same time I called her parents and asked them to find that bulgogi ahjumma's house in Busan. At first she didn't want to board the helicopter and said that I'm such a drama queen.

What the hell, nobody ever called me a drama queen. Beside I'm definitely not a queen and for whom I am this overly dramatic because of the bulgogi huh? I don't care her protest and just drag her to the helicopter and we reached Busan in just one hour.

She smiled widely after took the first bite of the bulgogi. I felt bad for that ahjumma because we had to wake her in the middle of the night and forced her to cook her famous (for Ga Eul) bulgogi. Actually not forced but bribed her with a lot of money until she agreed to cook it. So much for a bowl of bulgogi.

Her hormone continued to blind her logical senses. There was one night when she suddenly woke me up because she felt that she wanted to eat ja jang myun. Okay given to my status and capability, that was not hard to get but I can smell something fishy when she started to form her puppy eyes and pouted her lips and I know that her request will be much harder. She said that she only wanted to eat ja ja myung that cooked by chef So Yi Jeong.

I'm breathless when I heard that, where all the oxygen go? I never touch a gas stove before so how can I ignite the fire to cook? She sensed my hesitation and before I could ever talk, she put her head on my lap and begging me to cook ja ja myung with a sad voice. Oh no, she knew my weaknesses and she was playing with it and as much as I knew that she was only acting to be sad, I didn't have the heart to reject her request.

So I called my secretary to send the ingredients to my house and also the recipe for a beginner on how to cook ja ja myung in simplest way. I laid all the ingredients on the kitchen table and tried my best to understand the recipe and luckily I'm a smart guy and the instruction seemed easy for me. She was sitting there with her elbows on the kitchen table and her hands supporting her face. I knew her bright eyes were on me but I never lifted up my face to look at her.

I took almost three hours to finally put a bowl of ja ja myung in front of her. Her eyes were red and I knew she forced herself to stay awake to keep me company and because she knew I'm sleepy too and for her it was not fair if I'm the only one stayed awake although I didn't mind at all.

She ate it like it was the most delicious meal on earth. I tried to take a bite from her bowl and as soon as the noodle touched my tongue, I spat them out. It was tasteless but she said it was so delicious because it was made by the person she loves the most. I felt my heart wanted to burst after heard her 100th ++ times confession, so I just continued watching her eat my first hand made meal and I'm surprised that she can finished that tasteless ja ja myung.

I didn't know about other women but Ga Eul's pregnancy really makes my head ache. She became more stubborn, manipulative and also had a lot of weird demands. I believe that my secretary prayed every day for the time to fly quicker so that the torturous time will end as soon as she gives birth.

"I still want Yul Goon."

"No! Tae Jin is better."

"Can you guys shut your mouths up, it hard for me to scan the baby if she kept talking and moving on the bed!" The room suddenly turn to eerie quiet after the scolding from Ji Hoo.

Yes the argument still go on and I told myself not to surrender this time.

"Your son is growing healthily and I believe that this will be your last check up right Ga Eul-yang?"

"Yes Ji Hoo-sunbae."

"So all we have to do now is waiting for the right time and you must be prepared all the time. We already set a date for your delivery but that date is just an assumption and I hope you won't rely on the date too much."

"Don't worry Ji Hoo-sunbae, I'll make sure to be prepared all the time to welcome Yul Goon to this world."

"Stop calling him that name!" I didn't want to hear that name at all.

"Don't order me around! I'm not your wife!" There her hormone spoke again.

"But I'm the father of your child! Part of him is mine and he will carry my family name!"

"But he's in me! And I know he likes that name!"

"You don't know that! You just manipulate the fact!"

"ENOUGH!" Ji Hoo roared his voiced again.

"Ga Eul-yang, you want to name him Yul Goon and Yi Jeong-ah, you want to name him Tae Jin, am I right?"

We both nodded enthusiastically.

"Then name him Yul Jin or Tae Goon. You both have your share on those names."

We stared at each other at first and I kind a like that name.

"Yul Jin!" Ga Eul and I said it simultaneously and then we smile at each other.

"See it's not that hard. I can't believe that you guys still fighting over his name when the due date is just around the corner."

Finally we reached our agreement and finally we can call him with a name that we both like. I can't wait to see you So Yul Jin.


	6. Here He Came

**Chapter 5; Here He Came**

**.**

"Sunbae wake up." My sleepy head heard her moaning voice.

"What's wrong Ga Eul-yang?" I asked her with a mumbling voice and I didn't want to open my eyes from my deep sleep. What time is it now? I think I just closed my eyes few minutes ago so it's impossible that the morning had come.

"My stomach hurt."

"You want me to accompany you to toilet?" My body still didn't want to move.

"No, not that kind of hurt. I think Yul Jin is coming."

"Who's that?"

"Yah! Can you just wake up now!" She screamed her lungs out at me while she whacked my head with her pillow. "I said that YOUR son is coming and my stomach hurt because of the contraction idiot." And she called me idiot.

"What?" Now I'm fully awaked and realised that her night gown was already drenched. Her water broke and that was the prominent sign for her to deliver soon. "Okay let's go to the toilet I mean hospital now!" I then sprinted to the closet to take the 'emergency bag' that contained Yul Jin's and Ga Eul's cloths, diapers, milk powder and a baby blanket.

I helped her to walk to my car and within seconds we reached the hospital. I didn't have time to think about the traffic violations that I've committed or how many pictures of my car have been snapped by the roadside speed cameras to reach to the hospital this fast because all I can think about was Ga Eul's moaning in pain.

When I reached the emergency department, I can see a few staffs were already waiting for us at the entrance. I've called Ji Hoo before coming to his hospital and I'm not surprise to be given this VVIP treatment from his staffs.

They pushed Ga Eul into one of the triage rooms for preliminary check-ups and I waited outside.

"Yi Jeong-ah, how's Ga eul." I saw Ji Hoo jogged slowly to me.

"I don't know yet, she's in there for check-ups." I pointed to him to the room. "I'm sorry Ji Hoo for making you to come in the middle of the night. I know you really 'value' your sleep." I chuckled a little after I said that.

"Hey, although my sleep is very valuable but it can never be compare to you and by the way, I'm here as your friend not as Ga Eul's doctor."

"What do you mean?"

"It's the hospital policy. We (doctor) are not allowed to handle cases that involved our own family or friends except if it's really needed. But don't worry; I've passed Ga Eul's case to one of the best obstetrician in Korea and you are lucky because she's working here."

"Thanks Ji Hoo, you don't need to do that and you don't need to come here too."

"I'm glad to be here because at least I can see a very rare scene now." I arched my brows to ask him for further explanation.

"Who can ever think that the great So Yi Jeong will go to a public place with only wearing flip-flops, a pyjama bottom and a white singlet with a messy bedhead hair?" I looked at myself and just realised that I'm not dressed in 'proper' attire. I immediately tried to comb my hair using my fingers and I felt my face hot maybe I'm blushing?

"Don't worry Yi Jeong-ah, I think women will drool more seeing you like this." And Ji Hoo laughed his heart out.

Suddenly the door to the room open and they pushed Ga Eul's stretcher out from the room. I immediately reach out for her hand and squeezed it tightly to show her my support. They pushed her to a private labour room and the doctor called me.

"Mr So, your wife I mean Miss Chu's cervix have already dilated to 8cm wide so all we need to do now is to wait until it dilate to 10cm wide to proceed with the delivery process. We'll monitor her contraction and your baby's heart rate with this CTG (cardiotocogram) machine" She pointed me to a small machine beside Ga Eul.

"For how long we have to wait doctor?"

"Depends on the patient, some only takes less than 30 minutes and sometimes can take up to two hours."

"You mean she has to endure the pain for two hours more?" It pains me when I think that she was in this condition because of me.

"Yes. Of course she can take analgesic drugs or gas but I'm not recommended that. Only if she really can't tolerate with the pain then I'll prescribe the drugs."

"It's okay Yi Jeong-sunbae, I think I can hold the pain but please stay with me." I'm amused with her braveness and that makes me respected her more.

"I'll never leave you Ga Eul-yang." I squeezed her hand again and kissed her forehead lightly. I tried to calm her and we did the breathing techniques together.

One hour and eighteen minutes later, Ga Eul's cervix finally dilated until 10cm wide and the doctor gave orders to nurses to prepare for the delivery.

"Push Miss Chu." The doctor instructed Ga Eul and she tried her best to push harder. Sweats already accumulated on her forehead and she unintentionally squeezed my hand tightly until I can't feel my blood flowing to my fingertips.

"Arghhhhh! It hurt sunbae."

"I know Ga Eul-yang." I caressed her hair softly. "Okay one last push. Take your deep breath." I saw her inhaled deeply. "Now push Ga Eul-yang!"

"Arghhhhhhhhh!" She screamed as loud as she can and her screaming accompanied with a loud wailed from the baby.

"Congratulation Mr So, Miss Chu. You have a healthy little boy here. You can cut his umbilical cord Mr So."

I went to cut his umbilical cord and I saw him, he was so tiny and his voice so small although he wailed his lungs out. The nurse wanted to hand him to me but I immediately refused and asked the nurse to bring him straight to Ga Eul.

I just standing beside them and saw Ga Eul with a glowing face tried to calm him down. I wanted really badly to hug her and kissed her smiling lips, to thank her for enduring all the pain for nine month just to bring him to the world, to tell her that she looks exquisitely amazing today, and also I want to hold that delicate human being in my arms. But I felt that all my muscles went numb and my mouth cannot be open because I gritted my teeth so tightly. I hate myself for being coward, I'm afraid to feel happy because a jerk like me had no right to be happy. Maybe I didn't deserve them at all.

Slowly I walked away to went outside the room and saw all my friends and Jan Di were already waited at the corridor.

"How's Ga Eul sunbae?" Jan Di immediately asked me.

"Both of them are fine and thanks guys for coming."

Jan Di instantaneously went inside Ga Eul's room to meet her and left me with my friends.

"Yo my man, how's your feel. I can't believe that you've become a father now." I smiled warily at Woo Bin as I saw him gave me a teasing smile.

"I don't know Woo Bin-ah, I don't know what to feel. Happy? Afraid? I don't know." There was no point to cover anything from them. I felt so stupid right now because I can't label my own feelings.

"Come on, let's have a cup of coffee, it's been a long day right Yi Jeong-ah." Ji Hoo snaked his arm around my shoulder and pulled me to the cafeteria.

"Yah! I want to see baby Yul Jin first."

"Just come with us Jun Pyo, don't use Yul Jin to cling on your wife."

"I really mean it; I want to see Yul Jin …" Jun Pyo can't finish his word as Woo Bin pulled him to come with us.

"I think I want to be a father too." Woo Bin suddenly blurted out.

"Why? I'm the one who supposed to be a father first because I'm the only one who's married here." Speaking of the leader who always wanted to be the first of everything. I think he must felt detested at me right now because I cut his opportunity to become the first father among us.

"Because I noticed that all the nurses and female doctors only laid their eyes on Yi Jeong. I noticed that they even drooling when looking at him."

"Woo Bin-ah, you're wrong. They drool because Yi Jeong is wearing a sexy singlet that showed his well-built body, and his messy bedhead hair makes them dreaming about waking up next to our Yi Jeong." They all bursting into laugh after hearing Ji Hoo's teased.

"So do you mean if I wearing a singlet, all the ladies will drool at me too?"

"I don't think it's apt to your case Jun Pyo because I'm very sure that your tigress wife won't let you step outside your gate wearing that singlet alive." I can't help myself from laughing after I heard Woo Bin's words. Jun Pyo's face turned to red as he silently agreed with Woo Bin.

I knew what they were trying to do. They tried to cheer me up with their teasing and mocking with one another. They really know how to light up my mood, only with them I found happiness but that was before I met Chu Ga Eul. Should I be happy with her after all bad things I done to her?

After a while Jan Di came to us in the cafeteria. She said that Ga Eul and Yul Jin need to rest so she left her at her room and Yul Jin was move to the paediatric department. I asked them to go home to rest and they can visit again tomorrow.

I went back to her room and saw her already asleep. She must be tired and she looks peacefully while sleeping. I'm tired too and I decided to go home to take a quick sleep and to change my extra-attention cloth. Before I go, I chastely kissed her forehead and lips and adjust the light to make the room slightly dimmer.

When I walked through the silent corridor, my eyes saw a signage that guided to the paediatric department. Automatically my feet followed that signage until I reach to a place called a 'nursery'. There, behind a glass wall I saw few babies sleeping serenely in their bassinet and my eyes wondered around to find a familiar face.

Then I spotted him and without thinking I tried to reach him and caress him but all I can feel was that cold glass wall.

"Are your baby one of those?" Someone said it from my back. I immediately turned my face to look at the owner of that voice, it was a middle age nurse and she looked suspiciously at me.

"Yes. There he is." I pointed at him from behind the wall.

"Do you want to see him?"

"Can I?"

"Of course you can unless you're not his father." I felt that this nurse didn't trust me at all because she still drilling those suspicious eyes on me. What's wrong with my face? Is this face was not belong to a 'father'?

"I'm his father!" I said to her in more convincing voice.

"Then wear the medical gown first and you can go inside. I don't want you to spread any virus from your dirty body to these unscathed little babies." I took the gown from the nurse much to my dismay and followed her to the room.

I just stand beside his bassinet and watched his sleeping form. He was wrapped by the blue blanket that I bought last month.

"Well what are you waiting for." I stared back at the nurse with a confusing look. Then she continued; "Don't you want to hold him?"

"NO! I might hurt him or fracture his bone. I don't know how to hold a new born baby plus he looks so soft and fragile."

"To begin a long journey you have to brave yourself to take the first step first. If you don't know how then learn." She took Yul Jin from his bassinet and wanted to hand Yul Jin to me. I hesitated at first but I braved myself to accept him.

"Watch out for his neck, support his neck with one of your hand and hold his body with your other hand." She instructed me step by step and I followed her words diligently. As soon as I have him in my arms I felt a sudden jolt spread throughout my body and I can't take my eyes from him. Was it what they called the 'bond'? A bond that sutured by blood?

"There you go, it's easy right." I heard that nurse spoke to me and I just nodded without breaking my eyes contact at him. Then the nurse left me alone with Yul Jin. Instinctively I knew how to hold him with only one arm. I caressed his chubby cheeks and comb his hair with my fingers. His skin and his hair were so soft and I can't help to nuzzle my nose at his body and inhaled his sweet scent deeply. He reacted at my touch but he was so sleepy to wake up.

Mine. He is mine and I can't describe my feelings while holding him right now. There was no doubt that I'm so happy to finally meet him, my heart wanted to burst because it was overload by happiness. To think that I actually wanted to erase him from my life before made me cursed myself.

Suddenly a dropped of water fell on his face and he suddenly winced a smiled. Where that water came from? I look up at the ceiling but there was no sign of water leaking from it. Then I felt that water running through my cheeks and I realised that the water coming from me.

I'm crying! I'm crying? It was my tears but why I didn't realise it? I blinked my eyes a few times to swallow back the tears but my effort went into vain. It was like trying to stop a river flowing from a ruptured dam. I held him closer to me and tighten my embraced as I gave him butterfly kisses all over his face and body with my tears still flowing out uncontrollably.

He can't take it anymore and that too much disturbance from me finally makes him open up his eyes. He yawned his mouth as wide as he can and he wriggled his body softly. I loosen the blanket and he immediately shot out one of his arm from the confinement. I reached out to hold his hand, it was so tiny that I can hold it with only two fingers.

He was staring at me while I'm playing with his hand. I smiled at him and I inhaled deeply to introduce myself.

"Annyeong Yul Jin-ah. My name is SO…YI…JEONG and I'm your appa...


	7. Daddy's Boy

**Author's Note:** I'm very very sorry for the late update. Many things happen recently and I got distracted hahaha (okay I know it's not a good excuse) so please forgive me...

I use some words in Korean, so I listed the meaning below. Feel free to correct me if I'm wrong;

Aboeji/Appa = Father  
Ommoni/Omma = Mother  
Haraboeji = Grandfather  
Halmoni = Grandmother  
Samchun/Ahjusshi = Uncle  
Imo/Ahjumma = Aunty

* * *

**Chapter 7; Daddy's Boy**

A day after he was born, Ga Eul's parents came to visit their grandson. They were so happy to meet him and I also noticed that they started to treat me nicely. Her father said that I already pass the test. If I can survive during Ga Eul's pregnancy period then they can trust me to take care of their daughter.

Surprisingly my parents also came to visit us. One thing I've learn after Yul Jin birth is; you can never denied your own blood. No matter how bad my father was, no matter how mad I am at him, I could never hate him and I believed that deep inside his cold heart, he always love me and my brother and now maybe Yul Jin too.

"He looks just like my Yi Jeong." My mother said proudly at everyone in the room while holding Yul Jin.

"No, he looks just like my Ga Eul." Ga Eul's mother immediately interrupted and walked closer to my mother and Yul Jin. "See his doe-like-eyes and thin lips are just like my Ga Eul." Ga Eul's mother also stated it proudly while pointing at Yul Jin's face.

"Although he may have his mother's eye shape, but if you look carefully, those black coloured eyes definitely from my Yi Jeong. When he smiles, you can see the dimple just like my Yi Jeong. His nose obviously you know from whom and the shape of his face especially this long chin is no doubt inherited from the So." My mother said while pinching his chin.

Oh my, I'm sensing that this argument will last forever if no one interrupted them and for God sake, he's only one day old and how can they tell whose look that he took from?

"And the conclusion is he looks just like his father and mother." Thanks aboeji. My father finally interfered with a stern voice. He managed to stop the argument and made those grandmothers quiet for a while. Only for a while because five minutes later, they started to argue again about the planning for his future.

"Yi Jeong-ah, can I see you alone now." My father said with a serious face and made me gulped nervously. I realised that Ga Eul's face changed into fear and worried about what my father want to say to me. "Don't worry Ga Eul-yang, I just want to ask something from my son." I guessed maybe not a serious matter because he was smiling at Ga Eul to ease her worries.

I followed him until he stopped at the garden of the hospital and sat at the bench under a maple tree.

"I guess I won't ever know about him if I waited for you to tell me directly." He started the conversation after a long silent.

"How did you know?"

He chuckled leisurely after hearing my question. "You showed her to the world with a big lump on her belly during Jun Pyo's wedding party, you openly brought her to the shopping malls for shopping and dine at the most exclusive restaurants in town. Ah, not to mention the increase of your spending for the past eight months."

I silently listen at his words. When he sensed that I didn't want to reply, he continued; "I maybe look like I don't care at all. Truth is I don't care how you want to manage your personal life and spending but when it comes to something big like this, your mother and I actually feel sad that we didn't hear the news from your mouth. Do you hate us so much until you want to hide our own grandson from us?" I can sense angriness in his voice.

"I knew you will know. Although I've (with the help from F3) already controlled all the media from spraying bad stories about my personal life, I knew you have the powers to dig into my secret."

"Of course, but still we wanted to hear it from you. We heard about his birth this dawn and your mother wanted to go to the hospital straight away but I asked her to wait until morning. Actually she wanted to see you earlier to ask about Ga Eul-yang's pregnancy but I forbid her to mess with your life."

"She is not a mess!" My father just ignored me and continued;

"So she waited and waited for you to come to her but you never show up. That's why when she begged me to see her grandson, I don't have a heart to say no. I know you were shock to see us. I just want to say sorry to you because we show up like this and sorry if you don't welcome our sudden emergence."

"You done nothing wrong so no need for you to say sorry and I'm glad that you came."

"I know it is my fault to turn you into me but I hope you can be a good son to your mother. I think it is enough for just me to hurt her. Your brother totally shut off his life from us so she only has you Yi Jeong."

"If you know it then why you kept on hurting her?" I felt angry when I thought about my father infidelity with many women.

"I'm irreversible son." He looks sad and stayed silent for a while. "I've already lost the woman that made we wanted to live the right way. Once your heart is saturated with hatred, no amount of guilt will change you. That's why I wish my life would pass by quickly." He just kept staring at nothing for a while, maybe reminiscence about his past and suddenly he snapped out and immediately looked back at me. "And you, don't repeat my mistake and don't take too long okay."

"What do you mean, what 'don't take too long'?"

He just smirked at me and patted my shoulder before standing up and walked away. I sat there for a while and replaying back the advised that he gave me. What did he mean by that? Don't take too long for what? Why can't he tell me straight away? Argggh, my head hurt every time I tried to find the answer but at least I knew my father still cared about me.

Father huh? I can't believe I am a father now. I have someone who carried half of my gene, someone who inherited my family name, someone who bonded with me forever, someone that will called me 'appa', someone that permanently connected me to Ga Eul. His name is So Yul Jin, the apple of my eyes.

He grew up so quickly and Ga Eul never left me to involve with his development. She taught me how to bath him, how to wash his poop (although that was the job that I intended to escape), how to change his diapers (I'm so proud when I can change his diapers less than fifty seconds but the time became longer and longer when he started to crawl), how to put his cloths on, what temperature that suitable for his milk, the importance of burping him after feeding and how to tucked him to bed while singing lullaby songs.

The first time when I tried to burp him, maybe I patted his back too hard that caused him to thrown back his milk at my shoulder. There also times when he spraying his pee on me while I'm bathing him. Luckily I have lot of shirts so I just throw away the smelly shirts but the smell on my body stick for a few days. But for some odd reason I didn't mind at all when he dirtied me with his smelly fluids.

He likes me so much and clinging on me was his favourite habits. He always smiled every time he saw me. Every morning he would woke up early because he wanted me to take him for a short stroll around our garden before I went to work. Every time when I came home, I will straight away looking for him and after he started to getting around on his own, he will waited for me at the front door to welcome me home with his smiling face. All the tiredness I felt the whole day at work was simply washed away by his giggle and by Ga Eul's simple greeting; "Welcome home sunbae".

Sometimes Ga Eul would get jealous because she thought Yul Jin loves me more than her. She said I shouldn't spoil him too much. She even became more jealous when the first word that came from his mouth was 'appa' when he was just four months old.

"It's not fair."

"Why? I'm part of his life too."

"Well he always by my side almost the whole day and I trained him to call 'omma' in each second yet 'appa' is still becomes his first word." She pouted her lips at me.

"I'm sure his second word will be 'omma'."

"He better be or I won't feed him when he cries."

Witnessing his first time of everything had been our greatest pleasure. Hearing him said 'appa' for the first time almost brought tears to my eyes. My hopeless country bumpkin already crying although she was not satisfied with that word. I can tell that he was a smart boy. He was a fast learner and when he reached one-year-old, he can have simple conversations with us.

The first time when he tried to take his first step, Ga Eul and I waited in the most intense emotion. Bead of sweat accumulated at our forehead and our heart thumping so wildly. It was like watching my favourite football team tried to score a goal in a sudden death match. I waited at his back; ready to catch him if he fall and Ga Eul was in front of him; encouraging him to walk towards her. As soon as he lifted his foot and managed to propel without falling, we cheered loudly and he just giggling because he thought that we were in the middle of playing a game.

When I said that he really like to cling on me, I really meant it. Every night he only wanted me to tuck him to bed. I think he adored my voice so much. There was a time when I had to go to Italy for three days to attend an important conference and art exhibition. It was the first time I'm away from Yul Jin. The first day when I called home I heard him crying on the phone. Ga Eul said that he didn't want to sleep and kept calling his 'appa'. My heart painfully constricted when I heard him crying for me.

"Ga Eul-yang, please put the phone on a loud speaker."

"Okay sunbae, it's already on."

"Yul Jin-ah." I softly cooed his name and I heard his cry was suddenly stop but the hiccup can still be heard.

"He recognises your voice sunbae and he's searching for you."

"Yul Jin-ah, do you miss me? I miss you and omma so much you know." I closed my eyes to prevent the tears from burst out. "You can't sleep without that song do you? Appa will sing to you Yul Jin-ah."

_Hush little Yuljin don't you cry_  
_Appa's going to buy you your favourite pie_  
_If you are done eating_  
_Appa's going to buy you a golden ring_  
_If that golden ring don't shine_  
_Hush little Yuljin don't you mind_  
_Appa's going to love you till the end of time_  
_I'm always going to love you till the end of time_

It was originally called 'Hush Little Baby' but I changed the lyric to sooth him and I repeated that song over and over again until Ga Eul stopped me.

"He's asleep now sunbae."

She was waiting for my answer but I kept silent while hearing her slow breathing. Somehow listening to her breathing was like a music in my ear that entertained my lonely heart.

"Are you crying sunbae?" I snapped out at her question and immediately wiped away a few stubborn tears that shed from my eyes.

"No! Of course not. Why are you asking me that question? I'm not a little boy anymore. It's not like I can easily cried like a baby who miss his parents. I'm...I'm a grown up man, I can handle myself to live alone in the foreign land. And for your information, I just took the most delicious risotto ai quattro sapori for lunch and I can see the Colosseum and the ruins of Imperial Rome directly from my room window. I'm still thinking what to take for dinner and although I'm alone I still need to eat right. Or maybe I don't need to think and just eat whatever food they serve during the exhibition tonight. And then I'll just go to sleep because last night I can't sleep. Did I mention to you that I reach this hotel at 1 a.m. last night, or morning… whatever, after a long flight from Korea but still I can't sleep, maybe I'm not use to a new bed like you and…"

"Sunbae."

"Hmm?"

"We miss you too, I miss you a lot." A small smile appeared at my lips when I heard her confession but I chose to keep silent. "So please eat well, doesn't matter risotto whatever that I never heard, please sleep well in the room that you can see the great monuments from your window and enjoyed the art exhibition that I know you love to go. Then just a blink of eyes you will not realise that the three days were already gone and you can come back to us, we always here to welcome you back."

"It would be much better if you are here with me." I murmured slowly.

"What did you said sunbae? I can't hear you."

"I said, I'll follow your advised and wait patiently for the three days to be over. Go to sleep now Ga Eul-yang, I guess now is 10 p.m. there and I'm sure you're sleepy already."

"Bye sunbae, I love you." And she hung up the phone. The phone was still close to my ear and there was no sound came out from it but the last conversation kept replaying over and over again like a broken record. How easy she said it. Every day, not a single day that she missed to say that she loves me and every day, not a single day that her confession left me speechless and make me blushed profusely.

Of course that was not the only time that I had to go overseas for few days. And every time I'm away, I got the same symptoms of eremophobia. I hate to be alone but being alone although only for a few days made me realised something very important. Being away awakened the inner feeling of my heart and little by little it surfed up and showed itself. I can't believe it took me this long to finally see it.

Yul Jin is almost two-year-old and it means that I live with Ga Eul for three years now. But that feeling hide from me long before that. When I think more, I concluded that it was first invaded my heart from the first time I met her, the day she scolded me at my workshop.

How dumbass I am. To finally realise that the whole eight years I've been in love with her. I was once mistaken the definition of love with Eun Jae and maybe because of it I became this stupid. That time I thought I'm in love with her but I never change my lifestyle. Women were still clinging on me and I can't stop the infidelity.

But for the past eight years, I unconsciously loyal to only one woman, Chu Ga Eul to be exact. Yes for the first few years while I befriended her when we were still teenagers, I did flirting around but the fling never ends up on my bed. Four years in Sweden, I solely focus my mind to heal my hand and become a better potter, never think to flirt around with the blue eyed girls. Three years after I came back from Sweden, she is the only one that warmth up my body, the only woman I saw before I went to sleep and the only one who greeted me when I woke up.

Was there any other explanation for my loyalty? Why every time I'm away from her I will miss her like crazy? How can that little boy named Yul Jin light up my life so easy? Now I know what my father meant when he advise me not to take too long. I should listen to him, after all he was more experienced and he knew what it feel to loose someone that very important to you.

The 'love' had been dormant for so long and now I want it to wake up for good. I know I'm a little bit late but it's better late than never. But I didn't know how to say it to her. Every time when she said she loves me, I wanted to say I love her too but it was hard. I can say 'I love you' to Yul Jin so easily but I was so shy to say it to her. In the end I only whispered those words while she was sleeping, and after she hung up the phone, and sometimes I secretly stared at her and said 'I love you' loudly while holding Yul Jin. That 'love' was meant for her but of course she thought that I said it to Yul Jin.

How pathetic I am; a fool plus jerk plus dense plus shy (?) plus any bad words that anyone wanted to throw at me, I openly accepted because I know I deserved it. So now, all I have to do is built up my courage to confess to her and I hope I can do it soon. I hope…


	8. Volcano Eruption

**Author's note: **Here come the storm. What is life without ups and downs?

ps; Thank you for your review, it's mean a lot to me.

* * *

**Chapter 8; Volcano Eruption**

I'm sitting at my office and in the middle of a brain storming on 'what present to buy for Yul Jin' because tomorrow is his second birthday. For his first birthday I bought him stuffed animals, all kind of animals you named it. This time I wanted to give him a memorable birthday present. My problem now is I don't know what to buy because I think I've already bought him all kind of toys that exist in this world. That's why I still stuck in deciding what to choose for his present although tomorrow is his birthday. Arghh it was just his second birthday, it will be harder for the third fourth and the next and next birthday. I should started restraining myself from buying him present everyday like I did now.

Suddenly I was interrupted by the rigging tone from my phone. I looked at the caller id and it was my family chauffer that called me.

"Yes Mr Kim, is there a problem?"

"Young master! Something happens to Ms Chu and young master So." He said it with stuttered voice and he sounded afraid. I felt all my blood was drained away as I also afraid of what had happen to them.

"What do you mean? I demand you to explain to me now!" I'm so worried that I can't control my voice and scream at that poor old man.

"They… they have been attacked."

"WHAT? By whom?"

"Ms Chu wanted to go shopping for young master So's birthday tomorrow and she called me to pick her up. When we reached the shopping mall, she asked me to wait at the parking lot. The next thing I know, she with young master in her arms came running back at the car. Young master was crying uncontrollably and Ms Chu appearance seems a little bit messy."

"Straight to the point Mr Kim."

"I tried to ask her what happen and she just said that they've been attacked but she doesn't want to elaborate more and wanted to go home. I've already send them and I just want you to know what had happen."

"Thank you Mr Kim, I appreciate that you inform me about it."

I immediately rushed back home. My hands were shaking while I manoeuvring the steering wheel. I never felt so afraid like this, I can't wait to know what actually happen to them. I wonder why I haven't received any called from Ga Eul yet.

When I reached home, I saw Jun Pyo's car already park at my yard. I became more afraid than I already am. This must be bad, if Jan Di came with Jun Pyo than something really really bad had happen because Jun Pyo won't easily interfered in my argument with Jan Di.

As I'm nearing the front door, I can hear Yul Jin's wailing so loud from inside the house. I immediately sprinted to the door and open it abruptly. There at my living room I saw Yul Jin clutching his arms tightly on Ga Eul's neck and his feet wrapped around Ga Eul's waist and he wailing as loud as he can. He laid his red face at Ga Eul's shoulder, his eyelids were swollen so bad that I could no longer see his bright eyes, and what hurt me the most was listening at his melancholic wail. His voice was almost gone, an evidence that he had been wailing for quit sometime.

Ga Eul walked back and forth and patted his back gently and tried so hard to soothe him with the help from Jan Di and Jun Pyo that trailing closer. Jun Pyo tried to make funny faces and Jan Di clapped her hands to cheer him but none of the actions successful.

"APPA APPA APPA!" He lifted his face and opened his arms widely at me as soon as he saw me. The three adults immediately followed the direction that Yul Jin pointed and landed their eyes on me. I walked briskly to them but Jun Pyo was also quick and stop me before I reached them. He holds my shoulder tightly and said;

"We need to talk."

"Not now." I shoved his hand roughly and continued to walk to Yul Jin. I can't bear anymore to see him like that and all I wanted to do was calming my own son.

"I want to tell you something." The stubborn Jun Pyo now grabbed my elbow and stopped me again. I was very furious at his action and pushed him hard that he stumbled backward and almost fell.

"I said NOT NOW!" What the heck is wrong with him, can't he saw that Yul Jin is crying for me, calling me over and over again?

I took Yul Jin from Ga Eul's arms and he immediately wrapped his body tightly around me. I managed to take a quick glance at Ga Eul and saw some tear stain on her cheeks. She was crying too but why? She averted her eyes from me and slowly walked to her room followed closer by Jan Di. Surprisingly Jan Di didn't say a word at me; no sarcasm, no critics, no screaming and shouting and no physical abuse. It was either she didn't mad or really really mad at me to the point that she totally ignored my existence.

"Shush Yul Jin-ah." I stroked his back gently. "Tell appa what happen sweetheart."

"Ah… Ahjumma hate me (_wail_). They hate me (_wail_). They were screaming at me (_wail_). They pushed omma (_wail_). Their face look so mad and I'm so scare appa" (_a very long wail_). It was hard to hear his words because he was crying while telling me but I manage to understand him.

"I'm sorry Jeong-ah, it happen at my shopping complex and my staff inform me about it." Jun Pyo interrupted us while caressing Yul Jin's head.

"Can you tell me the whole story?"

"I've seen the CCTV recording. At first only a few bi (I knew he wanted to say bitch but he realised Yul Jin was there too) women cornered at them but then suddenly the crowd get bigger and they started to push Ga Eul. My security guards managed to save them from the crowd and she ran away with Yul Jin. I called Jan Di to inform her about it and that's why we're here now."

"Why didn't you call me?" I asked Jun Pyo with a confuse tone.

"Err I can just think about Jan Di at that time." Yeah right, always Jan Di in his mind.

"Appa why they hate me? Am I a bad boy?" Yul Jin asked me while looking straight into my eyes.

"Of course not." Jun Pyo beat me to answer his question. "The problem is not on you because you are the sweetest little boy I ever met. It was their problem because they all dumb and crazy and I swear I will hunt each one of them down and make them regret that they were born in this world." He used harsh words to answer a two-year-old boy question and I glared at him to correct his words but he didn't understand.

"Really ahjusshi? I'm not bad?" Yul Jin now looking at Jun Pyo with a curious face.

"No, not at all! That's why I love you so much, omma and appa love you too, Woo Bin-ahjusshi, Ji Hoo-ahjusshi, Jan Di-ahjumma, haraboeji and halmoni all of us love you." He planted a kiss on Yul Jin's cheek while smiling gently at him. Jun Pyo was like a second father to Yul Jin. I knew he yearned to have his own child but Jan Di didn't want a child yet. So he poured his fatherhood loved on Yul Jin.

"Jun Pyo-ahjusshi is right sweetheart, no one in their right mind can hate the smart and sweet little boy like you. You've done nothing wrong." Yul Jin seemed to calm down after hearing our soothing words. A few moment later, he fall asleep at my shoulder, maybe too tired after crying for so long.

"Jeong-ah, you need to ask Ga Eul what really happen today. Jan Di had tried and she just kept quiet but Jan Di said it must be happen because of you."

"Jun Pyo!" I heard Jan Di called her husband. She still called him by name with no honorific title. "Let's go back home. Ga Eul was asleep already, she cried so much today and she fall asleep while crying."

Not once Jan Di's eyes fell on me today but she looks sad.

"Come to think of it, this is all my fault. I started all of this. I shouldn't go to Shinhwa at the first place. I shouldn't drag my best friend into my problem. I shouldn't get involved with the F4." Jan Di sadly complained her thought out while looking at her foot but her words were like bullets that fired through my heart.

Jun Pyo immediately went to her side and wiped away the tears that started to trickle on her cheeks. "Hey, does it mean you regret to be with me?"

"It makes me hate myself more, to be happy now while my best friend…. had to suffer because of me."

"Come on, let's just go home." Jun Pyo wrapped his arm around her shoulders and dragged her to my front door and before he went out he said; "Bye Jeong-ah, don't worry they won't escape from me. No one can mess up with my kid."

I carried the sleeping Yul Jin in my arms and slowly opened the door to Ga Eul's bedroom. She was still sobbing in her sleep, I can still see the tears that wet her eye lashes. I put Yul Jin beside her and took a long time just to stare at the two persons that I love the most, more than my own life. 'Pain' was understatement to describe my feelings now. Watching their sad face was like burning myself little by little that I wish I could rather killed myself on the spot than have to endure the torturous pain.

What really happen? I wanted to wake Ga Eul to ask about it but she looks so damn tired that I didn't have the heart to bother her deep slumber.

I went out from her room and sat at my quiet living room. I didn't know what to do so I just sat there for hours until it was dark outside. I felt like I wanted to drink but there was no liquor in my house because Ga Eul prevents any liquid that contain alcohol to be brought inside the house. It was already dark but I didn't bother to switch on the lights because the darkness seemed to calm me down, it hides me from the reality that I need to see through the lights.

Suddenly the lights were turned on and woke me from my pensive thought. I saw Ga Eul's shocking face when she realised that I was sitting there all alone in the dark until she turned on the lights. She already changed her cloths and maybe had taken a shower. She didn't say a word and just continued to walk to the kitchen. I quickly followed her steps and saw her drink the plain water from the fridge.

"Are you hungry? Do you want me to cook you something?" I genuinely worried about her because she looks so weak and pale. She was not answering my question and just shook her head.

"Are you sure? You haven't eaten at all. You need to eat something or you will get sick."

"I lost my appetite. I just want to sleep." She tried to walk away from me and wanted to go back to her bedroom but I was fast to grab her elbow and halted her steps.

"Hey, don't you want to talk about it." I asked her gently.

"No." She tried to avoid my question.

"You have to tell me what's going on, why are you and Yul Jin being attacked by those bitches? I need to know." I forced her further.

"You don't need to know. You can pretend that it never happens."

"I can't! Who do you think I am? Why it's hard for you to tell me?"

"You are right! Who are you? You are not my husband and you have no responsibilities on me. I don't need your sympathy!"

"Ga Eul-yang!" I was shocked by her accusation and unintentionally I rose up my voice.

"Don't you dare to raise your voice on me! Fine if you want to know what happen then fine I can tell you about it." She started to scream at me.

"Those women called me a whore, a bitch, the filthiest woman that happens to be the object for the Casanova to release his lust. They told me I'm a disgrace to my family and to all women in Korea. I can't even defend myself because what they've said is true!" She abruptly shoved away the tears that started to trickle on her cheeks using the back of her hand. She then continued;

"Almost every night I surrendered myself to you, lost in your warmth embrace and I disregard my honour to embrace you back. I don't know if I should feel happy or dirty every time you touch me. And in return you gave me a blank check." She chuckled a little while her tears never stop to fall. "You gave me a black card that has no limit at all that I could easily buy anything in this world. I felt like I'm the first class whore and the most expensive one."

"Ga Eul-yang." I called her gently but she never wanted to stop her outburst.

"I can take it, I can swallow all their critics on me, I can be patient because I love you so much. I had to sacrifice the job that I love the most because the unwed mother is the perfect bad examples for the kids not to follow. I thicken my face to follow you to any events and functions although I heard a lot of bad murmured about me and I have to endure the judging stared from them. But today they've gone over my limits. They called my baby, my poor innocent little baby who done nothing wrong; a son of a bitch and an illegitimate child. And the most painful fact is, I can't defend him too."

"What?" I was shocked and speechless by her outburst. She was sobbing uncontrollably by now. She kept all her frustration in her heart all this time and today she wanted to release all the pain that clog in her heart.

"Nobody wanted to be friend with him. Can't you see he has no friend at all? I tried to bring him to the park and at first the kids wanted to play with him but as soon as their parents realised who he was, they will take away their children like he was infected with some sort of dangerous disease. It pains me to see his sad face and every time he asked me why those parents didn't want their children to play with him, I didn't know what to answer and he didn't deserve to be treated like that!"

"Ga Eul-yang." I moved forward to her to calm her down, I wanted really badly to hold her in my embrace.

"Don't touch me!" She moved backward to keep our distance. "I … I don't think I can take it anymore."

"What do you mean?" I looked straight into her eyes. Her soaking eyes showed me that she felt defeated.

"I have to protect him, I can't be selfish. I have to take him away, I should never let him involved in our problems."

"Do you want to leave me with him? Do you want to separate me from my own son?" I clenched my hand so tight to suppress my anger. I can even feel my nails piercing my palm.

"I think this is the best solution."

"NO! Why you don't tell me this earlier? Why you make me feel like I'm a useless bastard that cannot protect my own family? Why you want to leave like everyone else?"

"I don't want to force you to marry me just because you wanted to protect us."

"I never felt like that! I… " I wanted to say I love her but I think if I said it now she won't believe me and maybe she thought I said it to soothe her. So the stupid me who should ease her pain did the contradiction. I grabbed her shoulders because I'm mad when I thought that she wanted to leave me. I can't lose her, not after I completely fall in love with her, not after I can't live without her, not after I got spoiled by her love, not after she became my air; the most essential component to keep me alive. "I won't let you leave me. I'll hunt you down if you dare to leave me. I'll make sure that you can't live without me." I whispered those threats to her ear.

"YI JEONG-SUNBAE!" She screamed her lungs out at me and tried to wriggle her body away from me.

"WHAT? YOU THINK I CAN'T DO THAT! YOU DON'T KNOW WHO I AM HUH?" I scream back at her. I tighten my hold on her shoulders and shake her body while screaming at her face.

Suddenly I heard a faint sniffing sound coming not far from us. We both simultaneously looked at the direction where the sound came from. A well-known small body was standing beside the kitchen cabinet, clutching tightly at his favourite teddy bear with tears welling up at his eyes and a few drops already escaped and wetted his chubby cheeks. He was gritting his teeth to conceal the crying sound. I was shocked to see him, I didn't know for how long he was standing there and witnessing our fight. He just stared at us with a scared looking face, it pained me to see him like that. It was like a déjà vu, why he must experiencing the same betrayal like I had during my childhood. I perfectly knew what it felt when the family that I thought was the happiest family in the world was just an act when the first time I saw my parent fights.

"Yu …Yul Jin-ah." I called his name softly and loosen my hold on Ga Eul's shoulder. I averted my gazed back to Ga Eul and she was shocked too. I wanted to go to him but Ga Eul pushed me away and carried him in her arms. She stroked his back to calm him.

He was hugging Ga Eul so tightly but his questioning eyes never leave me. I don't know how to answer his stare, should I faked a smile to soothe him?

"I'm sorry Yul Jin-ah." I heard Ga Eul whispered to his ear. "This is all omma's fault. Did you awake because of the noise baby? Let me put you back to your sleep again and guess what you can sleep with omma tonight."

He didn't say a word and just nodded his head. Ga Eul carried him to her room and I followed closer. She locked her door from inside before I managed to get in but I'm not surprised with her action. It felt so quiet so sudden. I move closer to her door and lean on that cold wood, hoping that I could feel the warmth that emitted behind that door.

I'm not ready to leave them yet so I just sat there with my back leaning against her bedroom door. The fight replaying in my mind. Ga Eul's angry face, then replaced by her sad face, after that Yul Jin's sadness and the betrayal that he felt, those faces attacked my mind vigorously that I didn't have a will to stop it. It was all my fault to put them into this misery. It was all my fault that they have to suffer like this. What have I done? What have I done? I pulled my knees up and wrapped my arms around it. I buried my face on my knees and started to sob uncontrollably.

"I'm sorry… I'm sorry… I'm so sorry..." I cried and cried while saying those words. I kept crying pathetically in front of her bedroom door because I know I'm not the only one who cried that night, I made them cried too and I wanted to strangle myself because of it. I guess I'm a lot worse than my father. At least I'm happy for the first five years of my life but Yul Jin had to suffer when he was just two-year-old, and the worse was, it happens the day before his birthday. Is this the end already? Should I let them go? Am I capable to give up my heaven now?


	9. The Birthday Wish

**Chapter 9; The Birthday Wish**

**.**

I blinked my eyes few times, adjusting to the striking sunlight that coming from my bedroom window. I forgot to pull the curtain last night, forgot to change my office attire, forgot to take a shower before sleep and even forgot how I managed to sleep in my own bed. I looked at my bedroom door, I felt that I don't want to get up from my bed forever and walked through that door to face the hurtful reality behind there.

I am a coward, I perfectly knew that but I can't hide in my room forever. In fact today is Yul Jin's birthday, the day that changed me into a different man. I can proudly say that I've changed into a better man since two years ago. Since that historical day, he turned my life to be happier, blissful, livelier and lovelier. He's the best thing that ever happens in my life beside his mother, Chu Ga Eul. So he has the rights to be celebrated and he has to be happy today like how he made me happy since his existence in this world.

"Be brave So Yi Jeong." I told myself while slapping at my cheeks with both of my hands. I can't be coward like this if I didn't want to lose them. I got up slowly and opened the door. Usually I will welcome by the bubbly Yul Jin but today the house seems quieter than usual. It was breakfast time so they must be at the dining room so I walked through the corridor and spotted Ga Eul arranging the foods on the table while Yul Jin already sat at his chair. All the foods were Yul Jin's favourite dishes.

I watched them for a while until Ga Eul turned her gazed at me. Her restless eyes were still swollen from the cried yesterday and there were also visible black circled around her eyes. Of course she can't sleep after what we had last night. Then I realised that Yul Jin also stared at me but immediately averted his eyes when I looked back at him.

I saw a bowl of miyeok guk (seaweed soup) was served in front of Yul Jin but he just stared at the soup and didn't even drink it. He also didn't touch his favourite foods at all. I took a long deep breath to gain my courage and fabricated a fake smile on my face and then I walked to him and caressed his head gently.

"Good morning Yul Jin-ah and happy birthday to you." I crouched to his level to kiss his cheek but he turned his face away from me. That simple gestured almost stop my heart from beating and I done everything that I could to prevent my tears from flowing down again. Damn, I've already cried so much last night but why my tears still didn't drain out completely? I had to be strong so I shield my sorrow and pretended not to be affected by his action and kissed his head instead.

"Wow look at these dishes, it's all your favourite foods. Come on, drink your birthday soup and then we can devour all the foods together." I chuckled a little but I stop it immediately when I realised there was no response from him. "So guess what sweetheart, appa won't go to work today so we can prepare for your birthday party together. It would be fun, you and me, we can decorate the house, make some balloons, help omma to bake your favourite cake and we can even make a big birthday posters to welcome our guests."

I waited for a while for him to react at my words but he remained silent and emotionless in front of his miyeok guk. I looked at Ga Eul, I knew she was observing me since the second I step into the dining room. My eyes begging for her help to make Yul Jin talk and eat. She understood my pleading and took a sit beside Yul Jin on the other side. I also settled myself on the chair while still caressing his hair.

"Come on baby, take a sip. I specially cook this for you." Ga Eul tried to feed him with the spoon but he didn't want to open his mouth. The spoon hanging in front of his mouth for a while but he showed no sign to eat it. Then without looking at us, he got up and ran to his room.

We both sighed at his behaviour and that leave only me and Ga Eul with an awkward silence.

"So, I've already invited all our friends and families to come to the party tonight." I broke the long silence first.

"Okay." Was her short reply. She took a few bite of her food before suddenly stood up.

"Where are you going?"

"To Yul Jin's room. He needs to take his breakfast. I'll try to persuade him to eat."

I looked at her retreating figure as I also lost my appetite. I sighed again and chuckled at my cruel fate. I lost everything in one night, how cruel is that? No more bubbly greeting from Yul Jin, he no longer wanted to cling on me and he even didn't want to look at me. And Ga Eul, she no longer gave her lovely smile to me, no more goodnight and morning kiss and no more warmth from her embrace. It pained me to the core of my heart and it was just happen in a day, how can I survived if this continued tomorrow and the day after tomorrow and the day after that?

Silence surrounding the once cheerful house and I just wanted to run away from it but I've already promised myself to make Yul Jin happy today. So both Ga Eul and I prepared for his birthday party in silence, nobody dared to talk about last night fight. I did ask Yul Jin to help us but he ignored all my words and chose to lie on his bed with his teddy bear covering his face.

"Sunbae, I'm worry. Since this morning Yul Jin doesn't want to eat and drink at all. And now he doesn't want to take his lunch too."

"What?" I stopped blowing the balloons.

"I've brought the foods to his room but he doesn't want to touch it at all."

"Let me try okay." I assured Ga Eul.

"Hey sweetheart, aren't you hungry?" I took a sit on his bed beside his body. "Your omma has cooked your favourite foods. Come on talk to me please, Yul Jin-ah." I tried to pull away his teddy bear but he tugged it back to hide his face. "Yul Jin-ah, don't be like this, don't do this to me. Please eat, please talk to me. I know I'm wrong, I'm so sorry for you to see appa and omma arguing, you can scold me or hit me but please don't ignore appa like this."

"Appa and omma were yelling with each other! Appa and omma will not stay together!" I heard he murmured under his teddy bear.

"Baby, what you saw last night is not like what you think. It was like Tom and Jerry, they always arguing but they always stay together. Omma and appa, we never leave you alone."

"Lie! I saw your eyes. It was different, like now."

"Omma and appa just talked in a high voice." Ga Eul tried to soothe him again.

"Appa and omma never talk like that and I saw omma crying."

"Just eat okay, you need to eat if you want to grow like me." I pleaded him.

"No!"

"I said you must eat."

"No!"

"Ga Eul-yang, make him some milk. It easier to force him to drink the milk than the solid food."

Ga Eul made the milk and handed me the bottle.

"Open your mouth Yul Jin."

"No!"

"Don't make appa force you, so drink your milk!"

"No! No! No!"

I didn't have a choice than to force the milk into his mouth. So I grabbed his small body and trapped him with my arms and legs. He tried to free himself with all his might but his resistance was nothing compared to a muscular adult like me. I shoved the bottle milk into his mouth but he clamped his lips as tight as possible but it didn't stop me. With one hand I grabbed his cheeks and squeezed it to open his mouth. As soon as it opened, I immediately shoved the bottle into his mouth.

"Sunbae, you don't have to do that."

"I have no choice; he'll get sick if he doesn't want to eat at all."

He was crying and pleading for his mother to help him but I never stop forcing him to drink the milk. It also pained me to force him like this but I knew him very well, he got his mother stubbornness.

"Omma! Omma!" He kept calling Ga Eul while wailing uncontrollably.

"Sunbae please stop it. You're hurting him."

I ignored the pleading from Ga Eul and Yul Jin but Yul Jin also didn't want to lose and screaming his lungs out while I'm forcing him to drink. He tried to wiggle his body and tried to escape from my grasp. He shook his head and tried to spit his milk out. His resistance make him choked on his milk so I immediately released him and patted his back that caused him to vomit all the milk. He was now coughing uncontrollably and had difficulty to breathe. I saw some of the milk came out from his nose.

"I told you to stop! Look what have you done!" Ga Eul harshly took him from me and patted his back. Yul Jin kept crying on her shoulder and she shot me a deadly glare.

"He needs to eat something." I slowly whispered.

"He's just a kid, we should be more patient on his tantrum. You should know why he behaves like this."

"Are you blaming this on me?" I stood up from Yul Jin's bed and glared back at her.

"Do you see anyone else huh? I told you before, I can stand it if I'm the one who got hurt but I can't stand it if you hurt MY son!" She started to yell at me, maybe still affected by yesterday fight. I didn't like her accusation and I hate it when she claimed Yul Jin to be hers only. It made me angry and I started yelling too.

"I'm not hurting him and he is OUR son! OUR son!"

"And I regret that he is YOUR son!"

BOOM! Just like that my heart exploded at her last words, my chest felt so hurt. So much hurt that my brain reacted at the stimulation and secreted few drops of tear that welling in my eyes. I struggled to breathe because I felt like I'm drowning in the presence of more than enough air in the room. I felt like my whole world came crushing down to my feet. Did she really mean it? Did she really hate me? Did she really regret that I'm the father of her child?

My legs lost it strength to support me and I fell on Yul Jin's bed. I sat there while clutching my collar shirt to ease the pain on my chest. I can still hear a loud wailing from Yul Jin. He must be scared, we were fighting again in front of him.

"Sun…sunbae.." Ga Eul softly called me with a stuttered voice.

Suddenly I heard the doorbell ringing, signalling that our guest already came for the party but it was still too early. I immediately got up and walked passed Ga Eul to open the door. At least I have a reason to run from her. I can't see her face right now, not after she slaughtered me with her words.

"Aboeji, you're early." I greeted the person at my door step. My father took some time to scrutinise my gloomy face.

"Are you okay son. You look not so good." He looks so worried at me and it touched my heart every time I felt his love for me. I wanted so badly to cry on his shoulder and told him everything that made me sad. To feels his hand caressed my hair while told me that 'everything is going to be alright'.

"I'm okay. Just tired. Come in aboeji, I'm sure you want to see Yul Jin." I faked a smile at him and I knew he was not satisfied with my answer but he chose not to press me further.

"Yes, I can't make it for his party tonight because I have to go to China for an important auction. I've been eyeing for a certain historical masterpiece and I want to have it no matter what because it will be one of the best attractions for our museum."

"Oh, it's okay. Ga Eul's parent also can't make it because they want to attend a funeral of their close relative."

"Speaking of which, where is my favourite grandson? I can't wait to give him his present." My father lifted a clear plastic bag with water that contained three koi fish. He was smiling brightly while showing me the bag.

"Yul Jin is not feeling well and Ga Eul with him in his room." My father sprinted to his room as soon as he heard my words.

Yul Jin was still crying in Ga Eul's arms but not as loud as before. Ga Eul already changed his dirty cloths and cleaned his room. Ga Eul looks shock when she saw my father entering the room but immediately got up and slightly bowed to him.

"Hey baby, look whose coming?" Ga Eul gently whispered at his ear while caressing his back. He lifted his head from Ga Eul's shoulder and turned his head to my father. Suddenly his cried became loud again as soon as he saw his grandfather.

"HARABOEJI!" He cried out loud while spreading his arms to my father. My father immediately carried him in his arm and tried to soothe him.

"What happen sweetheart? Who makes you cry?"

"APPA!"

"Appa?" My father glared at me for an explanation.

"He didn't want to eat at all so I forced him to drink his milk."

"And why he didn't want to eat at all?" My father press further.

I looked at Ga Eul and she looked back at me. We were contemplating whether to tell him the truth about the real reason. He sensing our awkwardness and I think he can guess that the problem was coming from us. But I knew him too well, he won't interfere in my private life.

"Yul Jin-ah, look at what haraboeji got for you." He lifted the plastic bag at his left hand to be at the same level of Yul Jin's eyes. That boy instantly stopped to cry when he saw the fish swimming inside the bag. A long lost smile appeared at his face when he tried to touch the fish.

"You like it?"

"Uhm!" He nodded slowly while his eyes never leave his fish.

"Let's go release these fish in your pond okay." My father carried him to our pond at the garden outside our house.

My father managed to calm him down but he had to leave to catch his plane. I still didn't want to talk to Ga Eul and she also seems to like the idea of not speaking because every time we talk we will end up with a fight.

Our guests finally arrived one by one. No one new, just Woo Bin, Ji Hoo, Jun Pyo, Jan Di and my mother. Now I realised, Yul Jin's life was only surrounded by those people. Thanks to me he didn't has a friend at all. I shut him off from the world in intention to protect him. But it turned out that my good intention created a small niche for him. Unintentionally I caged him in his own house.

"Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday to So Yul Jin, Happy birthday to you." We all were singing the song for Yul Jin in a happy tone but he looks weak and pale in front of his birthday cake.

"Come on sweetheart, make a wish and blow your candles."

"Will my wish come true halmoni?"

"Of course sweetheart."

He then closed his eyes and said out loud; "I wish appa and omma will stop yelling at each other." He then opened his teary eyes and blows the two candles. I can see that everyone in the room were shocked at his wish and shot me a questioning glare.

"Come here sweetheart, come to halmoni." My mother called him and he walked slowly to his grandmother but before he reached her, he collapsed on the floor.

"YUL JIN!" My mother screamed his name and we all rushed to him

He was unconscious and looks paler than before. Ji Hoo and Jan Di immediately checked his body. Then Ji Hoo lifted his body and said;

"We have to take him to the hospital now!" He rushed outside and everyone followed him except me. I just stood there and still looking at the floor where he collapsed.

"Jeong-ah." Jun Pyo called my name and tugged me to go with him. "Let's go."

"Wait." I rooted myself there and slowly looked at Jun Pyo. "I haven't buy him a present yet…"


	10. Away

**Chapter 10; Away**

**.**

"Don't worry. His condition is not something serious. He just dehydrated and had hypoglycaemia. I've already gave him an IV therapy to increase his blood glucose and to add more electrolytes in his system but I need to talk to his parents, personally." The middle age doctor explaining to the people that already surrounded him as soon as he exited the emergency room. He was Ji Hoo's senior and Ji Hoo suggested him to be Yul Jin's paediatrician after he was born because he was one of the best paediatricians in the hospital.

"Thank you doctor Han." Ji Hoo shook his hand to show his gratitude.

Ga Eul and I followed him to his room while the others stayed at Yul Jin's room to keep an eye on him. He immediately talked to us as soon as we sat in front of his desk.

"I've ran thorough check-ups and found nothing wrong with his health. Physically he is a healthy kid but psychologically he is not." We just kept silent to let the doctor continued his talk. "This incident shouldn't happen to him at all. I can treat him now but the best thing to do is to heal the source of his illness. Is something happen at home?"

No one dared to respond at the doctor's question as we all perfectly knew the answer. Sensing that we were ashamed to tell him the problems, he continued;

"Toddlers at his age are actually very sensitive at their surroundings. Their mind is really simple, only black and white, love and hate, happy and sad, and nothing fuzzy logic in between. They judged on what they saw and heard. Their mind is not yet developed to handle complexity. They will try to understand something new or the abnormality in their everyday life but always find it was hard to comprehend and that would make them frustrated and scared."

"And they will find solace in their parents, the persons that they very close too. They will ask their parents for explanation, crying in their arms to release their frustration and hunger for their warmth embraced to pacify their scariness. Their parents are the main axis in their world to coordinates their life to move in the right path."

"So, can you imagine how they feel if their solace place is taken away from them harshly. Their axis that supposes to support them and guide them, crumbling down in front of their very own eyes. They want to ask why but to whom? They want to understand but how? They want two pairs of arms from their father and mother to embrace them, to protect them but when they have to choose, which arms should they pick?"

"Sadly to say, they are not capable to think that far. So they will do something to show their protest. Usually crying out loud is their best weapon but sometimes they will do something more and in Yul Jin's case, he chose to do hunger strike, maybe to gain more attention from you guys. "

"I have no rights to say anything about your personal life but as Yul Jin's doctor, I suggest you to start thinking about him more before you decide to do something. He's still fragile and easily got hurt and it is your responsibility not to let something break him apart."

"Thank you for your time Mr So and Miss Chu, I hope we won't meet again like this in the future. Please be more patient on him and try to gain his trust again."

"Thanks to you too doctor Han. We'll try our best to prevent it from happen again." I heard Ga Eul showed her gratitude towards the doctor while I just kept my mouth shut all the time.

We walked slowly in silent through the corridor to go to Yul Jin's private room. Not side by side but I let her walked in front of me as I watched her dejected back. She looks so tired while taking her step slowly, more like dragging her foots on the floor. Sometimes I saw her lifting her hand to her face, maybe to shed away her tears.

_"I … I don't think I can take it anymore."_

_"And I regret that he is YOUR son!"_

Her voice kept replaying on my mind. It was so hurt to know that she chose to give up. She chose to throw me to hell after she lifted me to heaven. She, the only woman that I love, regretted that the child I love more than my own life, was mine.

My strides became slower until I stop and made our distance became further and further apart. I just stood still while still watching her back until she disappeared behind the corner. Not even once she turned her face at me, maybe still too mad at me as I'm also felt too mad at her for being weak.

But can I blame her? Can I be mad at her when I knew the source of this problem actually came from me? Can I expect her to stay strong while I'm the one who being weak and coward? For almost three years, three damn years she devotedly stayed by my side in sin. She was a good daughter, a nice young lady, a once an honoured woman, a respectful teacher who happen to respect any life form and she even scolded Yul Jin for stepping onto a cockroach. She, who believed in a sacred tie called marriage and hoped to give her virginity to a man called her husband. She, everything good was in her blood but I changed her, I changed all her belief and I turn her to be someone that she hated the most.

I did wondering about her feelings but I chose to ignore because she never complaint it to me. I should know her, she would never want to worry me and she would buried all her sadness in her heart.

'Arghhh, why I'm so stupid and not realised it earlier?' I hate myself for being ignorant and not even trying to understand her needs. I love her with all my heart but I never said it to her. I never gave her assurance in our relationship. I let her hanging with a fragile thread without a safe ground to support her and she been holding the thread for so long and no wonder she felt tired and wanted to let it go.

I shivered at the thought of her left me alone. I'm scared, if that really happen someday, can I be strong enough to let her go. Or maybe she was right, maybe letting them go is the best solution. I think without me they won't suffer this much. Without me, they can live in a peaceful life as a commoner that nobody even cared about their personal life.

I always hate hospital. Hospital made me weak and scared. I can't stay at this building any longer. For once I wanted to be selfish and run away. And I did but at the hospital entrance I bumped into someone who was not supposed to be here tonight. He was shocked to see me wanted to run away. He immediately grabbed my collar shirt and smashed me to the concrete wall.

He was so mad and I can see it through his eyes. His eyes burning with anger and slightly red with moisture. I felt him tighten his hold on my collar and pushed me harder on the wall. He wanted to say something but he gritted his teeth to prevent any words coming from his mouth. His rule is simple, never interfered in So Yi Jeong's personal life.

"Aboeji, I thought you are supposed to be in China by now." I broke the long silent when I felt that he loosen his hold on me.

"Yul Jin is far more important."

"His room is 711, at seventh floor. You can see him there."

"Please learn Yi Jeong-ah. I'm not the right role model to advise you but please don't let this happen for the second time or you will lose him forever like how I lose you."

My father looked at me with sad eyes. He then proceeded to go inside the hospital and I saw him jogged to the elevator. I sighed, was he really my father? He bought a fish as a birthday present. Just a fish! He used to give me sport cars, boats, yachts and many expensive birthday presents but he gave my son a fish which I think is the best birthday present for Yul Jin. And now he willingly left the auction event and rushed back here from China because he was worried for his favourite grandson. He changed, maybe because he's getting older or maybe because of a certain boy that gave him his unconditional love. Maybe he found a chance and hopes in Yul Jin.

Yul Jin, I hope he's okay. I'm so sorry Yul Jin-ah, for your destiny to have a jerk like me as your father but I never regret to have you as my son, as my strength and as my sunshine.

I didn't realise that I'm already at the stall by the roadside in the middle of nowhere. Few empty bottles of soju line up at my table as I drank all my sorrow away. Ga Eul will surely scold me if she knew that I drank this much.

"Ga Eul-yang! I love you so much!" I scream as loud as I can and just ignoring the glared from the other customers.

Suddenly someone slapped the back of my head and I heard a female voice called me "PABO!" I turned my head and saw Miss Ha Jae Kyung's teasing eyes looking at me and smirking down at me. I rubbed my eyes and slapped my cheeks for a few times, I think I'm already over drunk to actually saw a ghost. I blinked my eyes few times but she's still there.

"Why are you still here?" I asked more to myself.

"Because I'm here."

"No, you're just a mirage of my drunken mind. An illusion that is not real. But of all people, why you? Why not Ga Eul-yang who should appear in front of my eyes now. Why not her?" I whined like a small kid that apparently annoyed the illusion in front of me.

"Yah." She twisted my ear and I scream in pained. "I said I'm here and I'm real pabo."

"Okay okay, it hurt. Let go of my ear. So I guess you're really real." I rubbed my ear gently to ease the pain.

"So you love her huh?" She eagerly took a sit beside me.

"What are you doing here?" Yeah, I'm really curious because last time I heard from Ga Eul, she was in India to expand her business there.

"I heard your confession. In fact I've already record it on my phone."

"YAH! Give me back your phone."

"I can but I already mail the video to my personal email so I can blackmail you in the future."

"What do you want?" I asked her irritably.

"Funny right, I actually wanted to go to your house to join the party but my assistance called me about an urgent case in this area. In short, the case settled and I'm yours now." She slowly scooted closer to me in a seductive move as I also scooted away from her and gave her a questioning glare. Suddenly she grabbed my waist and pulled me into a tight hug.

"YAH! Crazy monkey, are you nuts." I tried to release myself from her grip but she clamped her arms around me and pouted her lips to kiss me. "YAH! Don't you feel guilty to your best friend Ga Eul!"

She immediately released me and giggling at my frantic looks. "Tell me why I should feel guilty at her? Because I'm seducing you? Wait a minute, I think I done nothing wrong. You are not her husband so don't worry, she can't be angry about us. She has no rights to be mad."

"She has every rights about me!"

"Why?"

"Because… because she owns my heart, she owns my mind, body and soul, and because I love her."

"Then why are you drinking here right now."

"My son is admitted to the hospital right now. I made Ga Eul-yang cried, I made Yul Jin cried, I made them suffered. I, I, and I, all because of me. Cheers to So Yi Jeong, for being the greatest jerk in the universe." I held the glass of soju up high and drank it in one gulped. Then I continued;

"You know what, maybe I shouldn't 'know' Ga Eul-yang at all. I shouldn't interfered in Jun Pyo's love life and met her because the only thing that I gave her since we've met is 'hurt'."

"Do you really mean it? Let say if I'm not Ha Jae Kyung but an angel that came to the world and disguised in 'Ha Jae Kyung' form. If I can grant you one wish, do you want me to make you to never met Chu Ga Eul? Do you seriously want her out of your life so you can be a Casanova forever? You'll start your day with unknown woman on your bed, going to work just to show your face because you don't have a purpose to work, then going to the club drinking and flirting and bring another new woman to your bed and the same cycle will go on and on every day, every week until you wish your life would pass by quickly. Do you want that life?"

"No."

"Do you want to live alone in darkness?"

"No!"

"Do you want me to vanish Ga Eul and Yul Jin out of this world?"

"NO! NO! NO! I don't want them to disappear. I don't want to be away from them. Please angel, don't take them from me." I'm actually begging at her whom I thought was an angel.

"Aish, you are still not believed that I am Ha Jae Kyung right?" I just nodded my head. "Come on lets go."

"To where? Do you want to take my soul away? Am I dying?"

"To a place that you can release your frustration and how many times do I have to tell you, I am really Ha Jae Kyung. Come on!"

After half an hour walking (she dragged me actually) and half drunk, we arrived at the place that she meant earlier. My jaw hung open and I practically reverse myself to run away from that place but she was fast and pushed me inside. I guess she's really Ha Jae Kyung.

"Seriously Jae Kyung-shi, a karaoke centre?"

"Yup, the best place where you can sing away your sorrow. I suggest you to sing a rock song."

I can't believe I'm singing out loud and dancing wildly with a monkey while my son lying on the hospital bed. But somehow I felt good after singing few rock songs and my throat became sore.

"Let me choose for your last song!" Jae Kyung exclaimed excitedly. "Here 'You're My Everything' by Santa Esmeralda. You memorised this song right?"

"Yeah, but why?"

"Just sing it with your eyes close okay."

I started singing and somehow when I sing the song with closed eyes, I can 'feel' the lyrics more than before.

'_When I kiss your lips, I feel the rolling thunder to my fingertips, And all the while my head is in a spin, Deep within, I'm in love.' _Funny, that exactly what I felt every time I kissed her.

_'You're my everything, And nothing really matters but the love you bring, You're my everything, To see you in the morning with those big brown eyes, You're my everything, Forever and a day I need you close to me,  
You're my everything, You never have to worry, never fear, for I am near,'_

By the time I reach the chorus, my tears started to fall down and I had difficulty to keep my voice steady but I still continued to sing until the end. Yes, Chu Ga Eul is my everything. I opened my eyes slowly and saw Jae Kyung smiling tenderly at me. I smiled back at her as I understand what Jae Kyung tried to show me.

"Thank you Jae Kyung-shi."

"You're welcome Jeong."

After that, I became more determined, I'll do anything to make sure 'my everything' would always stay close to me. But I don't want to rush and I wanted to give her more times to calm down.

Yul Jin started to eat again after a secret persuasion from my mother. I don't know what my mother had told him and I don't care as long as he's eating again.

After a week, everything went back to normal. Normal in a sense of we live together again but not like before. We slept separately and seldom talk. Yul Jin finally wanted to speak to me but not as much as before. No more morning strolled with me and no more bubbly greetings from him every time I came home from work.

I can't concentrate during the meeting today and I don't know why my heart felt something different. I felt afraid so sudden so I decided to go home early.

My house seems quit clean and quiet. Usually Yul Jin's toys were lying on the floor, maybe he asleep. I walked to my room to change my cloths but I stop my stride when I saw that Yul Jin's bedroom door was slightly open. I wanted to close it but I saw from the small opening that Ga Eul was sitting in front of Yul Jin's closet. She was packing Yul Jin's cloths into a bag beside her.

Was she going somewhere with Yul Jin? Why haven't she told me? Or was she intended to leave me secretly. My body shivered at that thought, my heart beat faster and I could feel the cold sweat already dripping from my forehead. No, no, this can't be happening!


	11. A Shining Horizon

**Authors Note: **Okay enough of the crying hahaha. Sorry but Yi Jeong needs something strong enough to whack his slow brain. At least, better late than never right?

* * *

**Chapter 11; A Shining Horizon**

.

I was panic and stormed into Yul Jin's room. I kneelt down on my knees and wrapped my arms around her waist from behind. "Please, please don't go!"

"Sunbae!" Ga Eul was shocked at my action and slightly wanted to turn her face to look at me but I tighten my hold and rested my chin on her shoulder with my cheek touched hers.

"Please forgive me. Please forgive me for being a jerk, forgive me for being ignorant, forgive me for all the pain that I caused you, please forgive me for everything. Please, you can scold me, scream at me or even hit me but please don't leave me." I was already sobbing while begging those words at her.

"Sunbae, are you alright? You're shivering." I heard her asked me gently.

"NO! I'm not! You're leaving me, how can I be okay."

"Who said that I will leave you?"

I loosen my hold for her to move slightly to face me but still afraid to let her go totally. I looked at her with a confusing eyes and she was smirking at me.

"Aigoo, look at you sunbae. You're such a cry baby just like your son." Her slender fingers gently wiped away the remaining tears that running through my cheeks.

"But you're packing."

"Yes, because ommonim and abonim want to take Yul Jin to Disneyland in Hong Kong for two days. They came this morning and told me that they've promise to bring Yul Jin for a vacation if he start to eat again. He's already at their place and ahjusshi (family chauffer) will pick his bag when it's ready."

"My parents?" She nodded. "For two days?" She nodded. "So you're not going to leave?" She nodded. "So you're really really not going to leave me?" She nodded and nodded and nodded again while smiling.

"If I want to leave, I will not wait until today to do it." I heard her said it gently and simultaneously washed out all my worries.

Slowly I tighten back my embraced and kissed her cheek again and again and I moved my lips to her neck as she giggling the sweetest melody in my ears.

"I love you." The words came naturally from my lips as I nuzzled my lips at her neck. I waited sometime but I realised there was no reaction from her. Maybe she didn't hear it so I said again; "I love you."

Okay why I don't feel any reaction from her body? No stiffen shoulder and no abrupt stop of her giggling. I slightly pulled my face and stared at her. "I said I love you."

"I know, I heard it."

"Then, why you're not surprise?" I asked her back. Oh please don't tell me Jae Kyung already showed her my confession's video.

She fully disentangled herself from me and turned her whole body to face me. Slowly she cupped my cheeks with both of her hands and gently caressed it. "I always had this strong feeling in my heart that told me you love me. The way you treat me like a queen, the way you've been patient at my weaknesses, the gentle touches and caresses from you and also, you openly accepted me and Yul Jin." She sighed softly, then her smile became sour a little and she continued;

"But I'm not an angel sunbae. My heart still tainted with darkness. I thought it is enough to just have you by my side but then I become greedy, angry and weak. I always believe that actions speak louder than words and you've proved it to me but my greedy heart wanted to hear your love from your lips. I become angry to myself for my stupidity, to love you to the point that I felt that I'm not who I am anymore and worst, I blamed it all on you. I become weak, all the insults and critics from others really worn out all my strength."

"So I choose to ignore my guts feeling and pretended that I never felt your love. I feel that I've been patient for so long and part of my mind told me to give up. I even hurt you by saying those harsh words that I never meant to." She tried very hard to stifle her sob. "When I saw your broken face, I knew that nothing I can do to swallow back the words to my mouth. You look so sad and hurt, and I felt that I just killed you on the spot. I can't forgive myself and I'm afraid to face you and I don't know what to do to make you forgive me. I'm really sorry sunbae, I never meant what I said to you, I could never imagine myself having a child that not yours." And she let her tears fell down freely.

"Shushh, Ga Eul-yang." I hugged her tightly, caressed her back gently and tried to soothe her. "No, I mean yes I was hurt but when I think it over and over again, I realised that I'm the one who should be blame here, you've done nothing wrong. I've love you for so long but I'm too afraid to admit it and it caused all three of us to live in misery. But I promise it won't be happening again, ever, because I love you so so much."

And I ended my honest confession with a searing kiss. A kiss that I long to have every day since the day we fight, a kiss that only be broken by the need of air and the kisses continued again and again until I practically pulled away from her. I saw her slightly pouted her lips to show her dissatisfaction and I chuckled at her naughtiness.

"Relax Ga Eul-yang. Don't you realise where we are right now. I don't want to taint our son's clean bedroom." Then I scooped her with my arms to carry her in princess style and slowly stood up with her. I slowly walked to her room, our room now and continued what we started on Yul Jin's room and only stopped after the third delicious round to compensate what I missed for two weeks.

Heavy breathings were slowly calm down and we still embraced each other with me on top of her. Our sweat also started to completely evaporate by the cold air from the air conditioner. I slowly rolled to my side and pulled the blanket beneath us and cover both of our naked bodies from the chilled air. Then I pulled her close to me and wrapped my arms around her warm body. She just rested her head at my chest.

"I love you." I whispered to her while caressing her bare back but she chooses to keep silent.

"You really miss me huh?" She murmured the words softly and broke the long sweet silence. I can feel that her lips curved up at my chest.

"You bet! You're my drug Ga Eul-yang and I'm addicted to you. My addiction cannot be cure so I must have you all the time. Without you I maybe can live but I'm sure my life would be in misery."

"So Mr drug addict, how long can you stand without me?"

"Hmmm maximum is four months but only on a very special rare case but usually only a week and because of another special case like last week. Wait! Now I understand why you're turning to be Emily Rose, you've been possessed by your hormones again." Bingo, that's the reason why my sweet Ga Eul become cruel all of sudden. Why I didn't see it earlier.

"Am I that scary?"

"Only when you let your hormones speak. But don't worry, I still love the scary Ga Eul. I love you Ga Eul-yang."

"I think that's the 64th times you said you love me today."

"Really, then I still have a long way to go." She lifted her face to shoot me a confusing frown. I caressed her cheek gently while looking straight into her eyes. "I owed you those words for 2920 times, I love you since eight years ago and I should say it every day. I don't like to be indebted to anyone so starting today, I'll pay it with high interest rate for as long as I'm alive."

"Sunbae." She called me softly and I knew she was moved by my words. She gently pressed down her hand on my chest and raised herself to kiss my lips.

I cupped her cheeks when she pulled away from my lips and I stared at her big brown eyes. "I want you to know that Yul Jin is not my mistake but he is my prove of love with you."

"Yes he is our love sunbae." She smiled gently at me and wrapped her arms around my neck and buried her face at the crook of my neck.

"Can I ask you Ga Eul-yang."

"Hmmm."

"What make you stay? I mean, you've been hurt for so long but you choose to stay by my side."

"Because I'm stupid."

"Well, other than that?" She giggling softly and I waited patiently for her answer.

"Because you're just a mango and not a cloud."

"A mango!"

"When I was a child, I like to look up at the sky to see the clouds with so many different shapes. I really wanted to catch the clouds that floating at the sky. I begged my parents to bring me to Mount Halla. When I got to the top, I was really excited to see the clouds in front of my eyes. I took out many plastic bags from my backpack and tried to stuff the clouds into them. But at that moment, it suddenly hit me. I realised that impossible to hold onto clouds. I sat on the ground and started to cry. I worked so hard to climb to the top, but I got nothing out of it. But, it taught me that there are things that we can't get no matter how hard we tried to have it."

"Remember at Namsan Stair where I chose to let you go?" She asked me and I nodded softly. "That time I thought you were the clouds that impossible for me to hold, that's why I chose to give up."

"And now I'm a mango to you." I heard her chuckled at my words. "Why mango?"

"Because it sweet and sour and I really love to eat it."

"Of course I know you like to eat mango. When you were pregnant I think I've already bought more than 100 mangoes for you. Should I be touch that you equally love me like you love your mango?"

"So you want to know why you're my mango?"

"Yes please."

"When I was a child…" She started but I abruptly cut her sentence.

"Your childhood story again?"

"You want to hear it or not?" She sounded a little piss off at my interruption.

"Okay, please continue."

"When I was a child, my grandmother had a few mango trees at her backyard. She said the trees were older than me and it was very tall. My cousins and I liked to climb the tree to pluck the ripe mangoes that really sweet. Actually it's not easy to climb a tall tree which I'm sure you never experience that."

"No need because as far as I know, mango tree is not that tall and you can pluck the mango from the ground."

"My grandmother's mango trees are tall! And just shut your mouth and listen to me and don't insult my mango tree."

"Okay okay I won't say a word."

"Back to the story. One day I saw a ripe mango on top of the tree and I declared to my cousins that the mango was mine and nobody can touch it. So I climbed all the way up but at the middle I step into a fragile branch and it broke then I fell. I sprain my ankle and cannot walk for two weeks and the mango became rotten and fell to the ground. But I never give up and continued to climb the tree to have another mango. The best closure was eating the mango with my cousins on top of the tree."

"That's why you're my mango sunbae. It was not an easy pathway to go to you; it's tiring, need lots of hard work and patients, and sometimes I got hurt in the middle. But I can't give up and leave you on the top alone or you'll become rotten and fall to the ground. And you're worth to climb for, you're the flavour of my life. Sweet and sour just like the mango that I love the most."

I was speechless and touched by her words. She compared me with something so simple yet the meaning was deeper than Mariana Trench. I hugged her tightly and kissed her forehead and she hugged me back.

"Thank you. Thank you for never leave me rotten and never let me falling to the ground."

I lifted her chin to kiss her lips. It started with a gentle kiss but then it became intense as we switched position where my body hovering above hers. I felt her pushed me gently so I pulled from the kiss and stared at her redden face.

"Sun..sunbae, don't you think it's odd." She shyly spoke to me while bit the corner of her lip.

"What odd?"

"We've already did it three times and don't you think it's too much for a day." She asked shyly.

I smirked naughtily at her. "You're right Ga Eul-yang. Three is an ODD number. That is why I want to make it EVEN."

"Sunbae!"

I silence her with a searing kiss. At first she didn't kiss me back but then I heard her sighed in defeat and wrapped her arms around me and started to kiss me back with equal intense like I did to her. So the odd became even and the lady was too tired and sleep soundly beside me. She usually can't sleep with daylight but now she seemed so peaceful in her sleep.

I moved few strands of her hair that covering her face and looking at her made me felt complete. I was so grateful to have her by my side. She's my best friend, my lovers, the mother of my child and also my soulmate. Yes, I believe in soulmate now because I'm crazy in love with her. I tried to think for an explanation; why must her? She's not the prettiest woman I ever met yet her beauty never failed to mesmerise me. So the only logical reason was she's my soulmate.

I will woo her. I know I don't need to because we already reached this stage but she deserved it. I will take her on dates, watching movies in the cinema and strolling together hand in hand in the park. I smiled at my plan and kiss her forehead before whispered to her ear; "I love you."

I got up from the bed and dressed back before heading to Yul Jin's room to finish the packing. When I reached his room, I picked up one of the picture frames that line up on the top of his drawer. A picture of him in my arms as we look so happy together.

"Appa will get you back sweetheart, promise."


	12. The Wise Jerk

**Chapter 12; The Wise Jerk**

**. **

"Sunbae, please stop. It's tickling!" She tried to release herself from my grasp but still giggling every time when I tickled her sensitive spot. "Yah! The food will be cold if you don't stop it right now!"

"You distracted me while I'm in the middle of making the most artistic masterpiece. So you deserved to be punished."

"I've done nothing wrong. I step inside your workshop to call you for lunch. But I don't mind if you want to eat your clay."

"Wrong move Ga Eul-yang, now I think I would never let you go and just eat you instead." I opened my mouth widely and started to attack her by gnawing softly at her neck and ear while my arms still locked around her waist. She was giggling uncontrollably at my move.

"Ehem." I heard someone clearing his throat.

"Aboenim!" Ga Eul forcefully pushed me away as she realised my father together with Yul Jin was standing at the door. He was holding Yul Jin's hand and he looks a little bit embarrassed to catch me and Ga Eul in questionable close proximity.

Different expression painted on Yul Jin's face. He was smiling widely and showed his sweet dimple. He pulled his hand from my father and ran to me.

"Appa!" He screamed happily as I crouched myself a little and ready to receive him in my arms. He practically jumped at my open arms and wrapped his arms tightly around my neck and wrapped his legs around my body. I hugged him back as tight as I can. Oh how I missed him so much. My tears threaten to fall so I inhaled deeply at his sweet scent.

"I love you so much sweetheart."

He heard my voice and removed his head from my shoulder to see my face. He put his small hands at my cheeks and smiling widely at me; "I love appa too!" Then he kissed my forehead.

He put his left arm back around my neck while his right arm was extended at Ga Eul's direction and he looked hopeful at her. Understand what he wanted, Ga Eul walked closer to us. Yul Jin immediately snaked his right arm around Ga Eul's neck and pulled her closer. He also gave her a kiss on her forehead. I looked at her and she looked back at me, both of our eyes were moist with happy tears. We were snapped back when I felt Yul Jin tugged us closer with both of his arms. I winked at Ga Eul to send her a message and she understood. We both kissed his cheeks simultaneously and then we did a tight group hug. Yul Jin was giggling happily and he seemed to enjoy being pressed in between me and Ga Eul.

That time I knew no matter what happen, I won't be separated from Ga Eul because Yul Jin's arms will always be the concrete bridge that linked me and Ga Eul permanently.

"I guess I have to go now." My father's voice made me realised that there was somebody else in the room. "Sorry for not inform you earlier about our early arrival. Yul Jin missed his father and mother so much, so we shorten our vacation. Your mother went straight home because she was too tired, I guess we're not young anymore to entertain a two-year-old boy."

I walked toward my father with Yul Jin in my arms. "Yul Jin-ah, say thank you to haraboeji."

"Thank you haraboeji." He opened his arms to my father and hugged his neck. My father hugged him back. "I love you haraboeji."

"I love you more Yul Jin-ah. Be happy always okay."

"Erm!"

Yes, Yul Jin is back wholeheartedly. From lunch to dinner he kept talking and told us about his little adventure in Disneyland and Ocean Park. He said everything was big; Mickey, Minnie and everything was bigger than him, not like what he saw in television. "The fish are also big in Ocean Park and haraboeji let me ride the dolphin!" He smugly said to us.

I'm so happy that Yul Jin was back to his old self. Dr Han was right, Yul Jin's mind was so simple. He's easy to forgive and forget. He didn't hold a grudge. When he saw me and Ga Eul were happy again, it made him happy too.

So I started to execute my plan to have a date with Ga Eul. I hoped to have romantic events ahead but it was hard to be romantic when there was a third person came in between us. Don't get me wrong, I love that third person but sometimes he can become a 'disturbance'. At first we wanted to leave him at my parent's house.

He didn't cry but he played trick with our soft heart. He started to make a sad face, pouted his lips and moistened his puppy eyes. He hugged us tightly as if he don't want to let us go before waving his weak goodbye with a face that was about to cry. He's so manipulative like his mother. And of course he successfully won his game. Who can resist his adorable pout?

I wanted to watch romantic movies in cinema so I can be lovey dovey with Ga Eul. Or watch scary movies so that Ga Eul would always hold onto me because she was afraid of scary movies. But instead, I had to endure hours of watching 'Despicable Me', a marathon of all 'Shrek' movies and a marathon of all 'Toy Story' movies. He was sitting in between me and Ga Eul while giggling at the movie that I'm not sure whether he understand it or not. The worst thing was, he seemed to be infected with animation. He asked me to buy the DVD's of 'Finding Nemo', 'Ice Aged', 'Detective Conan?', 'Ben Ten' and many more which I never heard before! I'm sure Jun Pyo was the one to be blamed here; he taught my son many useless things.

And I can't have a candle light dinner too. For him, candle was made to blow. Every time the waiter lit the candle, he immediately blows it. Everyone in that luxurious restaurant can hear his bubbly voice because the restaurant supposed to be cosy and quiet. I can feel some displeased eyes were looking at us but nobody dared to complaint because they knew who I am. So in the end, we only went to a family restaurants that more suitable to speak loudly.

My last plan to romantically strolling around the park also crushed by him. I wanted to hold her hand and walking side by side closely. But there were always him in the middle. He liked to hold both of our hands and dragged us to wherever place he wanted to go. Sometimes he walk, sometimes he run and sometimes he skipping happily but never once he released our hands so we had to follow his pace.

Every day I never forget to buy flowers for Ga Eul when I came home from work. "A rose for my queen." I handed the flower to a blushing Ga Eul but I also can sense a hoping stared from someone that stood beside her. He tilted his head to look at me. "And not to forget, a chocolate for my prince." I handed him the wrapper and he smiling widely to accept it but I immediately pulled it back. "Do you forget something my prince?"

"I promise to wash my teeth after eat it!" I handed back the wrapper to him and he accepted it happily and jumping around with his favourite chocolate in his hand.

Five months after Yul Jin's birthday, Ga Eul told me something that I'm hoping for so long; a sign. Don't get me wrong; from the day we were back together again, I've already set a plan to propose her but I can't find the right time. I need the sign that told me that the right time has come and luckily I don't need to wait much longer.

"Sunbae, I think I'm pregnant." She looks shy while sitting at the foot of our bed.

"Are you sure?" I asked her with a serious expression but inside me, I've already cheering for joy.

"I…I'm late, and we've been active lately and and …"

"Why are you stuttering?" I feigning to be angry but then I saw her started to sob quietly. I wanted to act longer but her scared face made me stop my pretence. I slowly rose up from the bed and kneelt down in front her. I hold both of her hands tightly and looked straight into her eyes. "I'm sorry, I thought I'm a bad actor but apparently I'm not. I love you so much Ga Eul-yang. Anything that comes from you is a treasure to me."

She smiled widely in her sob and she bent down her body to wrap her arms around my neck. I held her closer and lifted her up. Her legs instinctively wrapped around my waist as I twirling around with her. We were giggling happily and I kept twirling around the room until I'm out of breath.

"It does not confirm yet sunbae, you don't have to be this happy."

"Well if it's just a false alarm, then we can try it again, starting now." I winked at her along with a wicked smiled.

The next day, I asked my secretary to buy me the pregnancy test kit.

"Again sir?" He asked me in front of my gate.

"I hope so. Just get ready Jae Min-shi, you have to work harder in the future." I patted his shoulder before I went inside my house. I can tell that he was worried, for the next eight months his peaceful life will be disturbed if it's confirm that Ga Eul is pregnant.

Ga Eul took the kit and went inside the bathroom while Yul Jin and I were waiting anxiously in our room and I had to answer so many questions from him.

"What is dongsaeng appa?"

"It's mean that you will be a big brother soon. You will have a friend to play with."

"Yeay!" He was jumping happily but immediately stopped his movement. "Where is my dongsaeng now?"

"In omma's tummy."

He looked at his tummy and then at my tummy. With confusion visible on his face he asked; "How can dongsaeng fit in a tummy?"

I held his hand and we walked to a rack of albums and I retrieved one of the albums from the shelf. Then I sat at the foot of my bed and lifted him to sit on my lap. I opened the first page and it was Yul Jin's first ultrasound picture.

"Do you see anything in this picture?" I showed him the picture and he just shaking his head. "Do you see this small little dot?" I pointed at the picture and he looked closer. Then he nodded his head. "It's you."

"Really?" He looked again at the picture.

"Yes, you started as a small little dot just like your dongsaeng now, then you grew bigger and bigger inside omma's tummy." I said it as I opened the next pages of his ultrasound pictures, from he was just a small foetus until he developed completely.

"Wow! I'm in omma's tummy but who put me there?"

"Me!" I answered smugly but then I'm kind a regretted answering his question without thinking the consequences. I shouldn't answer something that created more queries in his little brain.

I should know his next question would be "How?" and he lifted his brows while waiting for my answer.

I cleared my dry throat and swallowed my own saliva while trying my best to think the simplest answer for him but all I can think was …sex. "Hey sweetheart, do you prefer to have a sister or a brother?" I immediately changed the subject.

"I want a boy like me so we can play a war game together but he will take all my toys and we will fight! Hmmm if that's the case, I want a girl because girl is gentler but she can't be my wrestling partner. Hmmm it's so hard to choose! Can we have both appa?"

"Err one by one sweetheart."

"Why can't we have both?"

"Because…because…" Please Ga Eul, hurry up. I don't know how to answer him anymore, so many tough questions from him. Luckily my prayer was heard and Ga Eul emerged from behind the bathroom door with a sad face. I walked to her and she immediately hugged me and whispered to my ear;

"I'm sorry sunbae."

"It's okay my love, we can try some other time." I hugged her and caressed her back to sooth her. But actually, my heart was in pain too because I put a high hope to get another child.

"I want to say I'm sorry because …the next eight months I'll become Emily Rose that hunted your life and make your life miserable."

"Really?" I pushed her to look into her eyes and she nodded while smiling widely at me and I hugged her again. "Oh I'm so happy Ga Eul-yang."

"Yeay! I'm happy too." I heard Yul Jin shouted and jumping happily on the bed.

The next day I told Ga Eul that I wanted to spend my time alone with Yul Jin. I gave her an excused that I planned to have a guy bonding time with him. Yul Jin was so happy and he wanted me to bring him to an amusement park.

"Sweetheart, before we go to the amusement park, can you help appa to choose a present for omma."

"Sure! What present?"

"A ring but you have to promise me not to tell omma about it."

"I promise not to tell omma about the ring!"

"Good boy."

Maybe I sounded silly to trust a two-year-old boy to choose a ring for me but the woman that I'm about to propose is his mother. I wanted him to contribute in this big turning point of my life. So I carried him in my arms to look into the counter that have lot of rings to choose. I walked from one counter to another with him but nothing seemed to suit his taste.

"Wait." He told me to stop walking. "There, that's the one." I gave a signal to the saleslady to bring out the ring that he pointed.

"Are you sure omma will love it?"

"Erm!" He nodded eagerly.

I looked again at the ring and that time I knew I made a right decision to trust Yul Jin to choose my engagement ring. Asking him was like asking Ga Eul what she wants for her engagement ring. The ring was so simple; a titanium band with a heart shaped diamond that mounted on top of the ring. Simple but elegant and stylish, beautiful in its own ways just like its future owner. I gave the saleslady the right size and she put the ring in a dark blue velvet box.

"Okay sweetheart, time to pay for your hard work. Let's go to the amusement park!"

"Yeay!"

.

.

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_Back to the present_

"How could you do that to her? What is your excuse this time? You got drunk again? I knew it, I knew I shouldn't let you live with her."

And now I was surrounded by curious and furious eyes of my friends. I just told them about Ga Eul's second pregnancy and I knew Jan Di will get mad, that's why I brought Yul Jin with me to save me from her kick.

"Relax Geum Jan Di, this time I will take full responsible of my action. I'm going to marry her and treat her like a queen for the rest of my life. I promise!"

"It's not fair!" Jun Pyo suddenly burst out.

"And what's wrong with you." Jan Di asked her husband.

"Yi Jeong is going to have his second child already. They are more productive than us. We've been married for almost three years but you never want a child and still eating those pills."

"I thought you agree on it."

"No! I said 'okay' because I love you but I don't want to wait anymore. I know you're busy but I'm busy too. Yi Jeong is busy too but he still can be a good father. You told me to love Yul Jin like my own and I did but the one he loves the most is still Yi Jeong. No matter what I did he still choose Yi Jeong over me because Yi Jeong is his father!" I can't believe this, Jun Pyo still wanted to be the best of everything, even for my own son! Of course he can't succeed.

"I just want my own child that sees me on top of everything. A child that always proud on me regardless of my weaknesses. Just look at Yul Jin, he always proud with Yi Jeong no matter how jerk he can be."

"Hey, I'm not like that anymore!" I'm not satisfied with Jun Pyo's statement.

"Jan Di-ah, I think Jun Pyo has been tolerating with you for so long. Now Yi Jeong will get his second child, of course Jun Pyo will feel more jealous." Ji Hoo voice out his thought.

For me, I chose to not interfere although I also pitied my friend Jun Pyo. I think it was better to not say a word because I'm afraid that Jan Di will start screaming at me again about Ga Eul.

I looked at Woo Bin who seemed a little dreamy. Woo Bin had started to take over his family business and his father asked him to take care of their business in Japan. It was hard to see him so we are not close like before. Since Ga Eul lived with me, I got more attached with Jun Pyo. Maybe because our ladies were best friend. So the gang had changed, me paired with Jun Pyo and Woo Bin with Ji Hoo.

He realised that my eyes on him and he stared back at me. "Yi Jeong-ah, please make her happy." His voice was so low like he was pleading at me.

I gave him an assuring smiled and said; "Don't worry Woo Bin-ah, I love her with all my heart, of course I will make her happy because my happiness depends on her happiness."

"You better don't make her cry again or I'll make sure nobody ever heard about you anymore!" Jan Di threatens me.

I rose up slowly while still holding Yul Jin. "Wish me luck guys, I'm going to propose her now." I took a deep breath and walked out from the lounge. This is the time So Ji Yeong. Fighting!

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_The End_

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**Author's Note: **Finally the end of Yi Jeong's POV. As stated at the first chapter, the story consist of 3 person's POV and 2 more to go. Care to guess who will be the next?


	13. A Silly Lady Named Chu Ga Eul

**Author's Note:** Chu Ga Eul is the answer so starting from this chapter, the story is base on Ga Eul's POV. I'll try to minimised the repetitive scene because it's still the same story with the different person point of view.

Thanks for posting your reviews, it means a lot to me :)

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**Chapter 13; A Silly Lady Named Chu Ga Eul**

**.**

How dare they leave me alone here while they were having fun just the two of them! Because of what? To have guys-bonding time together! Just because I'm a lady so I'm not eligible to follow them! And now I'm stuck alone in an empty house doing chores just to fill my spare time.

"Omma hope that you will be a girl and we can have girls-bonding time together someday." I whispered softly while caressing my still-flat-tummy. "We can dress with the same gown, do make up together and we can share secret that man cannot know." I chuckled softly while imagining the future with my unborn baby. "Oh but if you're a boy don't worry, omma will still love you like I love your brother. Omma will always love you no matter who you are and no matter how naughty you can be because you're my pride and joy and you're the seed of love between me and your father." I said it with a wide smile on my face.

Just yesterday I was confirmed that I'm pregnant with my second child. Tomorrow Yi Jeong-sunbae will take me to see the doctor to have the first scan of our baby. He was so happy when I told him about my pregnancy, much more different expression compared when the first time I told him that I was pregnant. That time, more than three years ago, I told myself that I would accept whatever decision he'll take except one. If he asked me to abort his child, I swear to myself that I would run away from him and leave him forever. For me, a father that willing to kill his own flesh and blood was not a human being and nothing can be done with this heartless 'creature'. No hope at all.

And luckily Yi Jeong-sunbae was still a 'person' with a heart and has a hope to be a better man. Yes he had many flaws, not to mention how many times that I had to endure heartache to be with him but I never lose hope in him. It worth to fight for him, all my patients and efforts were not thrown into vain. I'm happy and feel blissful now, that's all mattered.

That's me, a happy unwed mother who about to have a second child with the same man that I love with all my heart. How I got into this mess? Well let's go back to the time when Yi Jeong-sunbae came back from Sweden after four years of studying there.

_flashback_

Four agonising years of separation, days and nights I'm holding to his promise to meet me first when he landed on Korea. We did stay in contact while he was away but the feelings would never be comparable when the person that I missed so much was actually standing in front of my own eyes. He looks more handsome, taller and broader, more confident, more dashing than I thought he already be and more manly than before. Gone the 'boy' that I used to know, he's now a young man who ready to conquer the world.

I wanted to hug him and feel his warmth again but I realised that I'm not in a suitable place to do that affectionate display. We were surrounded by untainted eyes of young children. So we just talked, smiling and talked again until he was summoned by his leader aka his best friend Gu Jun Pyo to meet him. He looks very annoyed by the interruption and cursed at his phone but as a loyal comrade, he excused himself to follow the order.

I can't describe how happy I am to have him back. What really matter the most was he truly holds onto his promised and seek me first when he came back. That must be meant something right? A Casanova that kept his promised to a common girl like me for four years, which was odd. A Casanova that never went for clubbing in Sweden (I got that info from a very reliable source), that was odd. A Casanova that usually on the front page of gossip tabloids with different women, was actually manage to stay single in every snapshot during his four years in Sweden, that was really odd.

All the oddness made me think that he must have some feeling at me. Maybe he changed because of me. Called me a self-conceited lady but I'm sure he likes me. Maybe he still not in love with me like how I'm in love with him but I took it as a start. He just got back here and we still have a lot of time to spend together. Our relationship can develop slowly. I knew that he was afraid of love so forcing him to admit his feeling was not an option. So I planned many things that we can do together and perhaps little by little he will fall truly in love with me.

That time I still don't know that "we can take it slowly" could never be escaped from my lips. All because of the drunkenness that I had on the same night he came back. I was so happy by his returned, also happy that my best friend Geum Jan Di finally met her happiness after facing so much trouble and will marry her soulmate. I drank the wine until it exceeding my limits. Actually I have a very low tolerant of alcohol, that's why I seldom drink it but that night my happiness made me forgot to stay sober.

I lost my consciousness and the next thing I remember was that I'm lying on the bed in a foreign room without any thread covering my body and there was somebody hugging me tightly from my back. I was so shocked and tried to move but the slight movement made my head ached and it felt like it was about to explode. I massaged my head to ease the pain and slowly realised the mistake that I already committed. Not only my head hurt, I could feel soreness all over my body and pained at my lower region. I knew nothing I could do to have my virginity back.

I can't see the face of the man that hugged me. I only saw his muscular arms wrapped around my body as if he didn't want to let me go at all. I prayed with all my heart so the man that hugging me was _him_, the man that I love the most. I can't take back my virginity but at least I hoped I've gave my precious treasure to him only.

Slowly I turned my body to face the man and he stirred at my movement. I released the breath that I hold after I saw his handsome face. 'Yes, at least it was him'. I studied his face for a while. I never have been so closed to him like this with the tip of my nose already touch his. His bangs covering his forehead and I restrained myself from combing his bangs to see his face clearly. There were visible stubble growing on his chin and upper lip and damned he looks so hot with those stubble. But one thing that made me sceptical about him, was he always sleep with a smile on his lips like he has now? He opened his eyes slowly and his smile became wider when he saw me.

"Good morning Ga Eul-yang." He greeted me and I can smell wine in his breath but I was too shock to greet him back. I just stared at him dumbfounded and he stared back at me. He immediately disentangled himself from me and rose himself to sit at the edge of the bed after he realised our proximity. "I…I'm sorry. I…I… it was a mistake because we were both drunk." He tried very hard to explain and he looks so stressful.

"I guess so sunbae. I can't even remember what happen last night." My head still hurt so I chose to lie on the bed while massaging my head.

I heard him clearing his throat and said; "Me too."

And that's all. No more explanation and we never mention about that one night again. The stupid me didn't even thought about the consequences from it. I should take some pills (which I don't know what pill because I'm a stupid naive ex-virgin) as a prevention and he the one that more expert in this field should remind me about it but he never did. So five weeks later I realised that there was something wrong with my body.

Every morning I got headache and nausea. My favourite 'thing' to go after I woke up was a toilet bowl. My body became weak because all the food that I ate will wasted in a toilet bowl therefore I can't get the energy from my diet. I thought it was just a normal food poisoning and not even suspected about any other important possibilities. And when the doctor congratulated me for being pregnant, all I can say was just; "Huh?"

I don't know what to do. How am I going to tell my parents, my best friend Jan Di and worse the father of this child? They must be disappointed on me. I could never imagine myself will end up in this kind of mess. First fault was engaging myself with premarital sex and now I had to receive the punishment by carrying the illegitimate child. I was so scared and I feel alone because I don't know to whom I can consult my problem.

A few hours after I knew that I'm pregnant, Yi Jeong-sunbae called me to have a dinner together. Well actually after he came back from Sweden we did met up almost every day. I spaced out during our dinner and he noticed that I'm not even touching my food.

"Are you okay Ga Eul-yang?" He asked me with a concerned face. "You look pale, are you sick?"

I looked at his concerned face and wondering whether he was ready to be a father yet. No, he just turned 24 and he has a bright future ahead of him. This thing happens too fast and I'm sure he will freak out when he heard the news. I wanted to have more time to think but no matter how long I take, it would never change the fact that he is the father of the child I'm carrying right now. He has every right to know.

I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply to gain more strength. Slowly I opened my eyes and looked straight into his eyes. "I'm pregnant sunbae."

His eyes widen in surprised and his mouth hanging open for a while. He regained composure after a few minute and asked me; "Mine?" and I nodded slowly. "When do you know about it?"

"This morning." I answered while looking down at my plate.

"What are we going to do about it?"

"How can I know?" I slightly raised my voice because I was annoyed by his questions. One thing I also noticed these past few days was that I easily got mad even on a simple thing and I feel my blood boiling all the time. "I'm sorry sunbae, I shouldn't raise my voice on you. It was not entirely your fault."

He averted his gazed from me. He seemed not comfortable when I talked about that night. "It's okay Ga Eul-yang but please give me some time to think. I… I really don't know what to do right now." I just nodded in agreement and true to his words, he went missing for a week.

For me, at first I thought this child was my biggest humiliation, but slowly I can't help myself to feel happy and fall in love with the soul that growing inside me. I knew I can't promise this child a good future and worse, there is high possibility that maybe my child will grow up without a father. But this sacred soul is mine and came from the man I love so carrying half of him inside me made me felt blissful. No matter what happen, I would never leave my child and I promised myself to protect and raised this child with all love that I can give.

Finally he came to my apartment and he looks so distressful. He promised me that he will take care of me but he apologised that he can't give his full commitment on me, in other word he cannot marry me. He said that he will do whatever I asked him to do, anything except marriage because he was afraid that he will hurt me more if I'm marrying him.

I'm not surprise by his decision because I expected him to back off. After all, he is still the So Yi Jeong that afraid of love. So the fact that he didn't ask me to abort his child was enough to make me happy. But what surprise me was he actually wanted to stay with me and he asked me to live with him.

I'm confused by his action. He told me he can't marry me but why he wanted to live with me? He told me he can't commit himself to me but he promised me not to play around with other girls ever again. I suspected that he had a mental problem because whatever he offered me was just as same as asking me to marry him, only not signing any official certificate. So if I accepted his offer (other name for proposal), it also meant that I accepted the risk of being 'intimate' with him again. Is that what I want?

Yes I want him because I love him and I want my child to have a father so nothing else mattered right? I can be with him and that's more than enough for me.

I don't have time to think so I just accepted his offer open-heartedly. At least he accepted me and his child. At least he wanted to take care of us. And maybe, just maybe someday I will manage to teach him about love and he will learn to love us. All I need now is patient, a lot of patient.


	14. Her Biggest Secret

**Author's Note: **Hi, I'm back! I actually wanted to list down around 18 reasons why I'm on hiatus for so long but then I thought; what's the point? I think nobody wants to hear my personal problem hahaha. So the most important thing to do is to apologise to my reader for the lack of updating my story. I'm really really sorry and you can throw anything at me; rocks, slippers, tumbler, chair etc. :)

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**Chapter 14; Her Biggest Secret**

Today Yi Jeong-sunbae and I braved ourselves to break the news to our friends. I'm more worried for him because logically they will put all the blames on Yi Jeong-sunbae's shoulders. And my worried came true because he was not only being kicked twice by Jan Di, but he also got beaten by Woo Bin-sunbae. Luckily Ji Hoo-sunbae was fast in grabbing the furious mafia prince because I swear I could see the murderous look in Woo Bin-sunbae's face.

I understand why he reacted like that, he willing to kill anybody that hurt me. It made me feel guiltier towards Yi Jeong-sunbae. He was injured because of me. I wiped away the blood from his lips and he just smiling at me to assure me that he's okay.

"It's alright Jan Di-ah, Woo Bin-sunbae, Jun Pyo-sunbae, Ji Hoo-sunbae. It was a mistake from the beginning. We were both drunk and …. and it happen. Please don't blame Yi Jeong-sunbae alone because it was my fault too." I tried to explain to them and begging them to understand us.

"Ga Eul-ah, what about you? How can you raise your child alone?" I knew Jan Di was worried about me. Yi Jeong-sunbae didn't want to marry me and of course she would be furious at him. I wanted to explain further but Yi Jeong-sunbae beat me to speak.

"Who said I would leave Ga Eul alone. I will take full responsible of my action. I still can take care of them without married to Ga Eul."

"Is that mean you will only be responsible financially?"

"No, I will stay by her side and take care of her during her pregnancy period."

"I thought only Jun Pyo got this disease, I never notice that you are more stupid than him." I quietly agreed with Jan Di's statement.

"Hey." Jun Pyo-sunbae tried to argued

"Shut up Jun Pyo, or I'll give you the same kick I gave to your friend just now. So Yi Jeong-sunbae, from what you told us, don't you think that it's sound like a married couple already. A husband who want to take care of his pregnant wife?" That's correct Jan Di, I also thought like that. I think it's true that Yi Jeong-sunbae becoming as stupid as Jun Pyo-sunbae.

"Er sort of but in my case I don't want to be attached officially to anyone. It's better this way than be marry without love." Ouch, Yi Jeong-sunbae's words hurt me. It was like he exclaimed to the world that he has no feelings at me.

"And you agreed to this scheme Ga Eul?" Jan Di shot me the question with a high voice.

I faked a smile on my face and said; "Yes. Please Jan Di, this is my decision, I hope you can understand." I looked straight into her eyes. My eyes begging for her approval and her glare started to soften down. Then I looked at Woo Bin-sunbae and signalling him to stay calm. He averted his gaze from me and I saw him balled his fists tightly and gritted his teeth to suppress his anger.

Ji Hoo-sunbae and Jun Pyo-sunbae have no problems to accept our decision and the quietness in that lounge we assumed as a silent agreement from the other two.

Yi Jeong-sunbae offered to drive me home and while in his car I received a short message on my hand phone;

-Meet me-

-Okay-

I immediately reply his message secretly from Yi Jeong-sunbae. I bid him goodbye and waited for about five minutes until a metallic carbon black supercar stop in front of me. He immediately revved up the engine as soon as I closed the door and the inertia from the sudden momentum forced my body to move backward. He was mad and he released his anger by stepping at the accelerator pedal until the pedal almost touched the car floor. The supercar diligently picked up the speed to fly on the road while the driver expertly over took all the vehicles that block his way.

"Please sunbae, I'm scared." I'm pleading softly while clutching his forearm. He looked at me and his furious face turn softer when he saw my pale face. He slowed down the car and began to calm a little. Nobody dared to talk and he drove the car in silent until he stopped at the river bank of Han River. Almost half an hour we stayed in dead silent and just absorbing the beauty of the colourful lights from the city of Seoul.

"Marry me." He suddenly spoke which almost stop my heart beat.

"Eh?" I turned my head to face him and he looks dead serious.

"Marry me and I promise to be a good husband to you and a good father to your child."

"Sunbae! Until now.."

"Yes!" He immediately cut my words. "I still love you and I will always love you."

"But I thought.."

"It's really hard not to love you." He cut my words again. "Please, please just for once. Please look at me."

"This child is not yours!"

"It is mine, if you said so. I'm willing to take the responsibility. You and me, we're always together and people already thought that we are a couple. They won't suspect anything."

"Woo Bin-sunbae! Are you crazy?"

"Yes I am. I'm crazy in love with you. You don't know how hurt my heart right now watching you being treated like a trash. You gave everything to him but he never appreciates it. I will never treat you the way he treated you. I love you and its hurt so much when you chose that jerk over me!"

His words left me speechless. He was looking directly into my eyes with a loving gaze and I can't stand it. So I immediately looked at my hands on my lap. I knew his feelings for me. At first, we started merely as a friend. He felt responsible to 'watch' me for his best friend. He's always by my side. He became my chauffer to drive me in and out from my college and he even chased away any possible suitor by 'acting' as my boyfriend which of course scared all the men that intent to get neared me. He helped me every time I'm in trouble and he always gave his shoulder for me to cry on. When Jan Di became busy with her study, I got more attached with Woo Bin-sunbae. We became closer; we shared our problems and settled it together. Never crossed my mind that our close relationship would lead him for hoping to get something more from me; my heart.

.

It happens during my graduation day last year. I was so happy to finally receive my degree after three years of study and he told me that he has special celebration for me. He booked the entire rotating restaurant on the top of N Seoul Tower and we have a romantic dinner just the two of us. The panoramic view outside was so breath-taking and I could see the whole Seoul below me when the restaurant completed it rotation.

"So beautiful!" I squealed in delight while looking at the view.

"You are more beautiful." He spoke up so I looked at his face and saw him staring affectionately at me. I smiled at him because it was not the first time he complimented me with his sweet words.

"Please sunbae, I had enough of your sugar. I'm still young to have diabetes." He chuckled softly at my words.

"Why can't you believe on your own amazing assets? You are the most beautiful woman I ever see, inside out. You are kind to everyone and you never judge someone by their superficial facts. You never scared at me although you knew about my family background and you knew that I'm capable to become like them."

I immediately reach out for his hand across the table and squeezed it lightly because I knew he was down whenever he was talking about his family. "I know that you have a kind heart too sunbae, that's all matters." I loosen my hold and retreated my hand but he immediately grabbed it back.

He looked at our intertwine hand for a while and then he stared at me. "I ….I have a problem Ga Eul-yang. I'm in deep trouble."

"What's wrong?" I squeezed back his hand as I can sense the coldness from it.

He had a hard time to tell me his problem and just stared straight into my eyes but then he said; "I love you." I was taken aback by his sudden confession and it left me speechless. Then he continued; "I know it's wrong to want my best friend's girl and I already tried very hard not to fall for you but you're just too strong to resist. I don't know when it started but your existent become my essential nutrient to freshen up my day. Every time when I tried to stay away from you, I will only end up living like a zombie who better been dead. I'll miss your face especially your lively smile, I'll miss your soothing voice, I'll miss your floral scent, I'll miss watching your soft and silky hair dancing gracefully as the wind played it tuned and I'll miss everything about you."

"I never feel like this to any woman and it scared me, especially the woman is you. For three years I've been living with you by my side and slowly you invading my heart too. I …realise that the time for me to let you go is getting nearer and nearer but I don't think I can do it anymore. I can't and don't want to let you go. Please accept me."

I forcefully pulled my hand out from his grasp because he didn't want to let go. I don't know how to answer him but judging from his gloomy face I think he already knew my answer. "I only have one heart sunbae and I lost that heart long time ago when somebody stole it from me and took it with him. I'm so sorry."

"You know what, I actually expected you to reject me but I just want to try my luck. I hate to live with uncertainty feelings, wondering whether you love me back or whether you'll give me a chance to woo you." He then exhaled a long sigh. "Now I know and it hurt."

"Sunbae…"

"Don't say sorry again. At least I know the taste of 'heart breaking'."

"Sunbae, are you going to tell Yi Jeong-sunbae about this."

"Are you crazy? Of course not. It will be a huge humiliation to the Don Juan image if anybody knows that I'm being rejected by a commoner. No way, nobody can know about it and you must swear in Yi Jeong's name that you won't tell anyone even to Jan Di."

"I promise." I chuckled lightly because he looks so funny with his flustered face.

"Hey Ga Eul-yang, be happy okay. If you want me to forget my love to you, you must promise me that you will live happily ever after with him."

After that night we continued to be just best friend. Nothing changed in him and he didn't seem to be 'affected' by my rejection. So I thought maybe his love was not strong enough and maybe he just got accustomed by my presence beside him so he was afraid to lose something that he got used to.

_Sighed. _Now I knew what I thought all these years was wrong and he masked his feelings so well that I couldn't detect that he actually was hurt inside.

.

"For all these years, I actually prayed for Yi Jeong to screw up. I followed every moved he take while he studied in Sweden, hoping to have some 'evidence' to show you that he could never heal his philandering sickness. But I was wrong and I hate myself because I'm his best friend and I'm supposed to be happy that he changed but I'm not and it made me felt guiltier to him. He maybe not a player anymore so I let you go but I guess one thing that he could never change, he doesn't have hopes in love and that's why he keeps hurting you. I warned you earlier, the only way to make me forget my love to you is by showing me that you are happy always. Now you broke your promise already."

"I'm happy now sunbae. I can finally be with him and I'm carrying half of him inside me."

"Bull shit! Are you stupid? You won't be happy. This is so not you! I know you very well Ga Eul. You will suffer and you know why? Because you are the country bumpkin who believed in sacred relationship of marriage. You only surrender yourself to your husband and carrying his seed. You are a good girl who always keep a good image. You are a good daughter who won't tainted your parent's face. You are.."

"Stop it! Please don't say it anymore." I closed my ears with both of my palms while started to cry uncontrollably. I cannot hold my tears anymore because what he said was true. I'm not that stupid to not think about all the possible heartbreak that I will get in the future. I did and I already calculated my 'tolerance' for the heartbreak and I came to a conclusion that I'm strong and patient enough to accept my dark future life that full with uncertainty. But hearing somebody saying those factual words made me sick to my stomach."

He gently pulled me into a tight hug and I automatically snaked my arms around his neck and buried my face on his shoulder. "Shush." He gently rubbed my back. "Please don't cry. I hate to see you crying like this. I'm sorry okay."

"I know I'm stupid but I believe in Yi Jeong-sunbae. I believe that he has feelings for me, I believe that he changed because of me, I believe that he will take a good care of me and our child and I believe that I can be happy with him by my side."

I felt him tighten his embraced around body and bringing me closer to him. "I guess nothing I can do to change your mind right?" I nodded at his question. "I love you so much you must remember that." I nodded again. "Promise me that you won't shed anymore tears after this."

I nodded slowly and said; "I'll try but I can't promise you."

He gently pushed my shoulders to see my face. He wiped away my tears using his thumbs and he brought my face closer to him and he kissed my forehead. "I hope you won't regret later and I will pray for your happiness."

"Thank you Woo Bin-sunbae. You are really like a brother to me."

"Ouch!" He put his hand on his chest and feigning to be hurt. "That is the cruellest words to say to a man who just proposed to you. You know a brother cannot 'love' his sister so in other words, you want me to totally lose my hope on you. And guess what, I'm a Song and you are a Chu so there's no way that I will be your brother because I won't accept you as my sister. Full stop!"

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**Author's Note:** If any LU followers can remember, my last story that I wrote on LU was 'The Stranger'. You know the story of Ga Eul had a one night stand with a stranger and got pregnant and then she met Yi Jeong and Yi Jeong fall in love with her and her son. I actually continued to write the story during my hiatus. I manage to write 3 new chapters before I got stuck again hahaha (sigh, I lost my muse again). So should I wait until Ms Muse come to me again and completed the story before I post it here, or should I just post it here although the story is still unfinished?


	15. Meet The Out-Laws

**Chapter 15; Meet The Out-Laws**

**.**

"Are you sure you want to do this sunbae?" I asked him with a soft voice.

"Of course!" He exclaimed excitedly.

"Let me rephrase my question. Are you sure you want to meet my parents and tell them that you have impregnated their precious daughter and want to ask their permission to let their precious daughter to live with you without marry to her?" I looked straight into his eyes while raising my eyebrows.

I saw him open his mouth and close it and then open it again as if he wanted to answer my question but he just let out a long sighed. "Well we almost there and I don't want to back off now." His voice almost inaudible to hear and he loosen his tie a little bit to relax from the tight knot.

I don't know why I agreed to him when he wanted to accompany me to tell my parents about the news. Maybe because I'm scared to face them alone and maybe because the dark side of me wanted to see him getting punished by someone that related to me, hopefully my father.

"How's your father?" I was startled by his sudden question. How he knew that I was thinking about my father?

"W-what do you mean?"

"Is he … a hot-tempered person?"

"Why, are you chickening now?" I let out a small chuckled as my teased made his face redden like a tomato.

"No! I'm not. I just want to be prepared for anything."

I continued to laugh at his adorable face. "My father never lifted his finger at me." I managed to answer after I stopped laughing. . "He would scolded me when I did something wrong but never resorted to anything physical. He's very patient and kind, unlike my mother."

"Your mother?"

I nodded eagerly while pursing my lips. "My mother is a moody woman. When she in a good mood, she will be very forgivable and understandable. But when she in a bad mood, then it is preferable to stay away from her or you will get hurt physically and emotionally if you done something to ignite her anger."

"Wow, your mother is so scary."

"Yes she is but at least I know the limit of her scariness. On the other hand, my father never showed his anger before so it's hard to predict what he can do if he's angry. Don't let your guard down sunbae; remember it is the calm and silent water that drowns a man."

When we reached my house, my parents initially welcome us with opened arms. We both knelt down in front of them in the living room and sunbae offered himself to do the talk. As soon as he finished talking, I saw my father's eyes looking painfully at me while my mother already weeping silently. I tried to hold my tears too but their disappointed face was enough to make my tears poured out uncontrollably. My father stood up abruptly and in the blink of eye his fist already landed on Yi Jeong-sunbae's face.

I knew physically sunbae had way much advantage compared to my father and he can easily avoided all the punches if he wanted to. But he chose to lay there and accepted the punishment willingly. My father seemed to lose his mind and neither me nor my mother were braved enough to bring his mind back. Somehow, part of me felt satisfied watching him getting the punches from my father. I knew it was wrong to feel like that but the voices inside my head always said that sunbae deserved that.

My father getting more violent when he grabbed the nearest broom because his hands started to ache from the constant punching of the well builds muscle man. He started to beat Yi Jeong-sunbae with the broom while cursing him for destroying me. My mother embraced me in her arms and we started to cry together.

"My poor daughter, what will happen to your future? Why it must happen to you? Why you must involve yourself with that jerk?" I heard my mother murmured in between her sobbed while caressing my back. I thought that she would be mad at me but her concerning tone touched my heart deeply and made me burst out all my sadness into her chest. I don't want to hold it anymore and pretended to be stronger.

"I'm sorry omma. I'm so sorry. I have ruined all your expectation for me. I'm a bad daughter and I ashamed to admit that I'm your daughter." I cried so hard until it hardly for me to speak in between my sobbed and hiccup.

Finally my father stopped when he heard his precious women cried agonisingly. He fell on the floor, exhausted and trying to catch his breath. Then he realised the damage that he had done to Yi Jeong-sunbae.

"We better bring you to the hospital." He said softly while helping Yi jeong-sunbae to sit up.

"I... I'm okay Mr Chu. No need to send me to the hospital." Yi Jeong-sunbae tried to look okay and grinning at my father only to show his set of white teeth that stained with the red blood. He winced at the pained that caused by the movement of his facial muscle on his already swollen face. "On second thought, maybe I need some aspirin from the hospital."

He went through thorough check-ups in the hospital and I'm not surprise when the doctors even asked him to do a whole body MRI scanning. So much for a Korean heartthrob. What the hell of the doctors thinking? That he would get a brain damaged from my father's punches? For goodness sake, not a single bone was fractured from that ordeal!

We went back to my parent's house and I warned him not to talk a single word because the last time he talked, he ended up inside the MRI machine.

"Appa, omma. I know I'm completely a disappointment to you. You raised me to be a respectable lady that will honour our family's name. Instead, I became a disgrace to our family. I know nothing I can do to redo my previous action so now I just want to think about the future."

"By living with the man that did not want to be responsible to you! Is that the future that you're talking about?"

"Appa .."

"Chu Ga Eul! I'm still strong enough to work and feed both of you and your child. I'm willing to accept both of you, so come live with us and leave that jerk now!"

I can feel that sunbae's body beside me became tense at my father outburst. I looked at him and I saw his worried face staring flatly at me. There was something in his eyes that I'm afraid to admit. Afraid because I'm not sure whether it was true or not. His eyes seemed to beg me to not leave him and his eyes telling me to stay with him. As always, I chose to think positively and trust my analysis.

"But I want my child to have a father." I told my father one of my reasons to stay with sunbae.

"And what about you?"

'I want to live with the love of my life too.' But that thought left hanging inside my mind. I can't answer my father's question loudly so I chose to keep silent. Then I heard my father let out a long defeated sighed.

"Ga Eul-ah, you know that your father and I will always love you no matter what happen to you. So come back with us okay baby." My mother took her turned to persuade me.

"I can't omma." I answered her softly. 'And I don't want to.' I added in my thought.

"I promise Mr and Mrs Chu, I will take a very good care of your daughter." I immediately turned my face sideway and glared at Yi Jeong-sunbae because he refused to listen to my warning. I've warned him not to speak a single word. But my glared became softer when I saw his determining face to convince my parents. "I know I'm not a good person. I know that I bring nothing but hurt to her. But for this once, please allow me to take care of your daughter."

My parents looked at each other after hearing sunbae's words and my father asked me the final question. "Are you sure you will be happy with him?"

I realised that all eyes were focusing on me to hear my answer. I took a deep breath and turned my face to look straight at Yi Jeong-sunbae's black orbs. "I'll definitely be happy with him." I said it confidently and added more in my thought. 'Because I love him so much that I'm willing to sacrifice anything just to be with him.'

Sacrifice anything? What a selfish thought I had at that time, but nobody knew what will happen in the future. That including me...


End file.
